Remember the album Hunky Dory by David Bowie? How about Ice Cube's seminal masterpiece, The Death Certificate? What about the first time you heard the opening 45 seconds of Gimme Shelter by the Stones?

The advent of autotune in the late 1990s, followed by the arrival of Amazon and YouTube in the first decade of this century, then the rise of streaming over the last decade, has led to a dearth of musical talent and a lack of reward for those who still possess skills.

The sterilisation of music by corporate greed affects us all, particularly those too young to know any better, listening only to the repetitive, androgenous derge pumped out by some of the talentless poseurs currently calling themselves musicians.

We can change this, right now, with new legislation that allows indie artists and bands to flourish through the tried and tested medium of the music video. For too long, music videos have been the preserve of those backed by deep pockets. Now, with your help, all that can change.

Henceforth, music videos will be required to adopt an identical format: specifically a moving image of a 7" LP version of the single revolving on a turntable, interspersed in 30 second increments with still images of the artist or band against a primary colour background. [1 new image permitted per full minute of music (rounded down to the nearest minute), with background RAL nos. 5015 (sky blue), 1003 (signal yellow), and 3020 (traffic red) used respectively in sequence]

The whole system will be implemented and monitored by an actual government department: The Ministry of Sound.

With your help, we can ensure legislation is enacted that makes failure to comply with the above format a criminal offence, punishable by substantial fines,with lengthy prison sentences for repeat offenders.

Act now, and let's make music great again!