Get MatPat to do a video on Reuben from Minecraft story mode getting turned into nuggets.

Get MatPat to do a video on Reuben from Minecraft story mode getting turned into nuggets.

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Rich Uncle Pennybags started this petition to Game Theorists YouTube Channel

I woke up early this morning, 4 o'clock sharp. Even my dreams were tormented by the challenge that faced me. My most difficult case yet lay in front of me like an insurmountable wall. Every time I thought I got a new breakthrough I lost my footing and fell to the ground painfully, the peak ever just beyond my grasp.

"I should be able to solve this", I thought to myself, "I have the most successful gaming theory based YouTube channel in the world, I have 11 million subscribers counting on me to solve this one. Why can I not do it?" The thoughts haunted me as I lay in my bed. I should be happy, I'm successful and have a wife and child. This is everything I have ever wanted yet my most devious of enemies still outwits me... McDonald's. The name stings like a bitter comment about my latest Fnaf theory video. 

"I should be able to solve this",  I repeated the words over and over in my head, awaiting a brilliant spark of inspiration to enlighten me about the truth. I was so sure, convinced that I was right. I needed evidence, but I was right. McDonald's had been serving chunks of Reuben the pig inside of their nuggets all along, but I needed to know how. Surely if I could figure out the true identity of Sans then this should be no trouble. How can Ronald McDonald possibly hope to defeat the brain that deduced the size of Luigi's genitalia.

I limped downstairs to get myself a cup of coffee. I needed the energy to truly make a breakthrough. Once my coffee was made I slumped into my office chair and looked at the evidence I had layed out on my desk. Pictures, files, and news stories amassed over my years at the channel. I sifted through them blankly, almost robotically as I repeated the routine I had done thousands of times before. Each image I had seen before, every word I had read before. Every time I had had the same useless and unfounded ideas. "Perhaps" , I said to myself "we would need to wait for the spec ops team to raid the McDonald's headquarters after all, that would surely discover the truth... Yet the thought of all those people risking their life in such a reckless way troubled me. If I was to save them, the case needed to be cracked before the raid took place."

Yet as I sat there no inspiration came to me, there was no way I could connect the dots to form any evidence beyond my personal hunch. I glanced once more at an old sales report from McDonald's and skimmed over the text. Suddenly, I realised that there must have been something more sinister underlying the seemingly innocent report. They had to get the information to their shareholders somehow.

Suddenly, it hit me harder than how I tell my viewers to smash that subscribe button. I jumped out of my chair and ran to get my UV light from the cupboard. My hands trembled as I shone it across the sales figures of 1992 Big Macs. Slowly, the invisible ink began to reveal itself, the hidden message detailing the illegal selling of reuben nuggets at McDonald's restaurants was right in front of me. Finally, I had proof. Finally, I could avenge my fallen swine comrade.

Immediately I started work on my video, my magnum opus. Carefully but quickly assembling the thumbnail and clips I needed. I had to act quickly for Ronald had agents everywhere. It wouldn't be long before they found out I had cracked the code. They would come for me then. I started recording the audio for the video as quietly as possible, I couldn't afford for this to get out before I was ready. Once I was done I logged into the Game Theorists YouTube channel and pressed upload on my latest creation, my whole body was trembling as the upload bar slowly crawled its way towards 100%. 10, 20, 30, now 50, 70, 85, 99... A sudden bang deafened me and I heard the window to my right shatter, I ducked under the table as a bullet raced past my head. Ronald was here.

My heart sank as I realised in my panic I had knocked my laptop onto the floor, worried I had lost everything I crawled over to it and turned it over, holding it in my bloodied hands sliced by glass shards. I nearly jumped for joy when I found the upload had gone through, I regained my composure but happiness filled my soul. I had done it. Reuben could rest easy now. Ronald would finally come to justice.

Keeping low, I crawled toward the broken window. I took a quick look outside, my heart beating through my chest. I saw Ronald had disappeared into the early morning darkness. But I was glad, I had faith the authorities would track him down, and if they failed... I knew I still could. I am MatPat. I am unstoppable.

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