It’s time to put the living legend and American hero Joey “Jaws” Chestnut up on Mount Rushmore!

“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed, by their Creator, with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.”

Yes... All men have the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. But... They are all not created equal. One American stands alone at the top of the mountain... This man is the living legend, Joey “Jaws” Chestnut.