Imagine being pregnant and the day your baby girl is born she is taken from you. You did not want this to happen but your husband did. Your little girl is placed for adoption. The moment your little girl leaves the room your heart is broken into a million pieces and you never get over the pain this has caused you. Ten months after your baby girls birth you develop a brain tumor. Even you say it is from the stress and sadness this situation caused you. Once this diagnosis comes you are given only eighteen months to live. Though somehow you find the strength to live a long sixteen years with cancer from the brain tumor. Around your daughters eleventh birthday you file with the state for contact with the baby girl you named Christine. Not one day goes by that you don't think of her. Prior to then, each year you would ask for an updated picture of your little girl.
Many believe that you have held on for so long because you're waiting for your baby girl to grow up so she may contact you. Unfortunately you are gone too soon. You left this life four and a half years too soon. Your daughter was only 16 years old the day you took your final breath and she needed to be 21 years old to file without her adoptive parents signature per state laws. Time ran out for this mother and daughter. Contact was never made and now it is too late.
The woman in this story is my birth mother, Pamela. I am her daughter. My mother was controlled by her husband, my birth father. He told me directly that he had a "nervous breakdown" and panicked when I was born alive. He didn't think he could be a father to me so he decided it was best for both of them to place me for adoption. He made the choice for her.
I want a law passed so if a birth parent requests contact with their adopted child and years later is going to die the child or adoptive parents should be told a contact request was made and time is running out.
No one should have to go through what my mom did. No birth parent should request contact with their child and not have that request answered before they die.
It is too late for my mom, but it is not too late for others! This law needs to get attention both in Illinois where I was born and nationally!
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