A KNIGHTHOOD For SHANE WARNE!
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This request, nay demand, is simple - it is time for Shane Keith Warne to become SIR Shane Keith Warne.
Wisden Cricketers' Almanack, the Bible of Cricket, in all their wise wisdom, a while back chose 100 cricket experts from around the world to pick the best five players of the 20th century. The list they revealed was this:
1. Sir Donald Bradman
2. Sir Garfield Sobers
3. Sir Jack Hobbs
4. Shane Warne
5. Sir Vivian Richards
Well there is something very obviously wrong with this list. There is a SIR missing. Yes, at present Shane Warne is the only member of the top five who is not a Knight.
This is outrageous, and must be rectified ASAP.
Mr Warne's credentials for this honor speak for themselves.
708 test wickets. 1319 first class wickets. Hundreds of one day wickets. Ashes trophies, World Cups, beating the mighty West Indies in the West Indies, the getting out on 99, the flipper, the champagne on the balcony, the bunnies, the baked beans, the lifestyle, the romances, the life, the man, the legend.
And that's just his cricket. He's also a philanthropist, a journalist, easily the best commentator going around today, an entertainer, a larrikin, and an all around Australian hero.
Plus, he's the ONLY member of the list above who isn't a Sir. Even Jack Hobbs has one. Well when was the last time you worked on YOUR wrong-un inspired by Hobbs?
Your Majesty the Queen, Mr Prime Minister, Mr Opposition Leader, and Australians, and cricket lovers around the world - the time is NOW. We need to do this before the next inevitable referendum on Australia becoming a republic. And the only way to make sure that happens is to do it NOW. Have I said now yet? Well I'll say it even more NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW.
Please sign this petition!
Please post around with the hashtag - #SirWarnie
Also share this petition with all your friends. Post about it on all of your social medias. Take your sky writing planes into the air and write it in the sky. Put it on t-shirts. Get it tattooed on your face. Train your cats to meow 'sir warnie'. Get the snakes in the zoo to spell it with their bodies. Plant millions of tree seedlings in the shape of these words big enough to see it from space. Invent robots, then program them to say it relentlessly. Let's do whatever it takes to get this done.
And arise - SIR SHANE KEITH WARNE!
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