As I wait for the results to be released I can't help but worry about Kelsie and no matter what the outcome will be she will be affected the most because of her father's selfish choices to kidnap and keep her all to himself. How does a father not want his other two daughters, but chooses Kelsie? Just further confirms it's all a just a heartless game of winning to him. Either way all I want is for Kelsie to be happy and free of her nightmares in the end. I want her to learn she has two families and that she is allowed to love both. I want Kelsie to be able to lay her head down at night and actually get a peaceful night's rest having nothing but the sweetest of dreams knowing she's safe. Those nights she fell asleep in my arms she laid there, peaceful, and slept there all night. And when it became morning she would wake up everyone and say, "Look mommy the sun is up. Let's play." And we'd play all day long spending quality time together. Picking up like we never were apart. Whatever the decision is I hope it fills all the desires of Kelsie's heart. Kelsie knows the truth. She knows she is being kept from me and by whom. Not because I ever speak of him at all with her, but because she knows she is taught to "hate" and by who. Yet instead she chooses loves. She chooses to love me while we are together, but has to pretend she "hates" me when apart. I love you Kelsie Lynn. And if the decision results to us being forced apart may you always know I'm here. Waiting. I love you and I always have. And know I never once blamed you for any of your negativity towards me or things that have happened as it is all out of your control. I love you, pinkie promise.
These are Kelsie's tear filled eyes as I had to take her back to him. The pain in her face is forever embedded in my mind. You see and hear her in the video that's posted as we had to say goodbye, but I see her facial expression full of confusion and worry as she just fell into my arms. You hear her voice full of fear. At the same time she tries to be so strong. As she fought back those tears she knew in her heart she could always find me there. To pray. To find me in her dreams. She knows that I have always come back for her. Six years of pure injustice and I keep coming back for more.
Kelsie had to give me the flamingo back that she held on the drive to meet her father as she isn't allowed to take anything I give her but she knows she will see this flamingo again one day. Every single thing she knows I keep and she will see it all again. Even me, her own mother. Until we meet again always know, I love you and always have!