A Saint for Life
Dear Father Ptak,
We, a group of very concerned Our Lady of Sorrows Saints parents, are writing with
many issues that have come to light this past school year. There have been several situations that have occurred amongst our children that were mishandled, and we continued to move onward in hopes that they were just learning curves among the administration, faculty and students. The most recent events have really affected all of us and we are very concerned about the harsh decisions made against the students involved.
Regarding the annual 8th grade Washington D.C. trip, we have read the policies and criteria for the trip, and neither student broke policy, yet they are no longer permitted to go. The criteria are clearly stated and both boys have documents proving they have not broken the written policy for this trip. Having said that, there is no consistency among decisions made toward different students. This has been an ongoing issue with no resolve. There are several instances that can be brought up that show favoritism towards certain students and discrimination of others. This is a trip that most of these kids have been waiting for since preschool. To take this trip away from any of them is not the right answer. Children don’t learn by taking things away as a punishment. All that does is lower their self-esteem and create heavy resentment. Kids can learn more from serving and having to commit to activities that help them grow in respect for all those around them. Instead of such a cruel unmerited punishment as taking away such a beautiful experience, make them work to improve. Offer cafeteria clean-up, apology letters, cleaning classrooms, helping teachers after school. Children will learn more through service, hence the motto of the NJHS at OLS. We, as parents, are asking you to highly reconsider this decision. We have an amazing group of students that we are proud to say grew up as OLS Saints.

 Regarding the expulsion of children at the school, we really feel this needs to also be reconsidered. These children were interrogated without their parents' knowledge or presents. No parent condones what the kids did. This incident involved the same ex-faculty who used to swear at our children and threaten them every day. Remember, we lead by example. That is not an excuse for what they did but it took multiple parents and months of complaints to acknowledge how this teacher was treating our children. It was repulsive and disturbing to know she was an educator at OLS. The children made a mistake and admitted to it. They cannot take back what they did, and we are sure that looking back, children realize their wrong doings. Again, what are children learning from being removed from school? Administration needs to understand the gravity of their decisions. As grown adults, we can easily look back at all the silly things we did growing up, trying to fit in or stand out. You can’t look at one incident and remove amazing kids from their environment. Neither of these kids are a threat to anyone and should be forgiven. They could have been easily offered different forms of penance. Instead, the harshest punishment was given with no reconsideration.
Our kids will fail. Our kids will make mistakes. Our kids will break rules. Our children will also apologize. Our children will help those around them. Our children will protect one another. They are your children for at least 8 hours in a day. We entrust our children into your hands. We as parents should not be worried everyday that administration and faculty will find a reason to reprimand our children. It’s sad to say that so many parents send their kids off to school in the morning and instead of telling them to have a great day, we tell them to stay out of trouble and keep their head down. This has become the normal at OLS. It’s as if there is a deliberate angle to push children out of the school. This was never the case in the past. Our children are coming home with words from staff that are so wrong and demeaning. Comments like “you’re a

 liar,” “you don’t belong at this school,” “you are hooligans, not to be trusted,” “you are not a disciple of Christ,” “you are untrustworthy,” “you’re a cheater,” the list goes on. How are our children to respond when the leaders are talking to them in such a disgraceful tone. OLS stood for something amazing not so long ago. That seems to have slowly faded away. Our children go to church during school and with their families on weekends. We are constantly taught the meaning of Mercy, Love and Forgiveness. The actions and decisions made by administration and staff are the exact opposite. No child should be spoken to this way or treated poorly by anyone. The Leaders should be promoting Catholic values, not tearing our children down.
Multiple parents have had several issues with administration’s communications with faculty / staff issues. It has either turned into multiple messages and emails with no response or a bland response from another member of staff. It is the responsibility of any administrator or faculty member to respond to any parent’s concern in a timely manner. This is unacceptable and another display of careless administration.
We, as Catholic families, are honored to be able to provide for our children’s education. We are requesting that all above matters be reconsidered as we are one family in Christ. Our administration needs to be re-trained in conflict resolution, debriefing and counseling. The proper training would help our children grow and situations would be dealt with differently, allowing a better learning experience for all. Our children should not feel like they will be punished with every step, or fearful when their names are being called. The culture at Our Lady of Sorrows needs to change to provide love, forgiveness, warmth, laughter and education. It should not be a rarity for our children to be praised or complimented. Humans thrive on positive reinforcement and sadly, that is lacking at OLS. We cannot continue to fund a program that is not based on core Catholic values and positive learning. Every family at OLS makes a lot of

 sacrifices to ensure they can afford sending their children to Catholic school. It is not easy doing what we do for our children and the school. It takes so much from each and everyone of us to make it a beautiful experience for all our children.
In closing, we are asking that all above decisions be reconsidered, and proper training of administration and faculty be provided. We should never be where we are as Catholics. It is a shame that it has come to this. Our voices need to be heard, for the sake of our children and future Saints of Our Lady of Sorrows.
Leaving you with a reminder, in case it has been forgotten. The Mission of Our Lady of Sorrows School is, in partnership with families, to educate students who will develop spiritually, academically, and socially into disciples of Jesus, fed by the Eucharist, who will live to inspire and serve others in the world.
Thank you for your time and consideration,
Our Lady of Sorrows Parents