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NC, NJ, CT and NY - Please stop Driving Away Divorced Dads!

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This issue is incredible, impossible to believe and yet it's true!!   It's happening in NJ, NC, NY, CT, FL and a few other states.  And it's tearing families apart!!! 

What is happening?  Draconian laws enacted over 40 years ago were intended to protect the very poor.  But they're having unintended consequences on the middle class. They're  driving men from their home states, bankrupting them, devastating them completely.  This article provides some background:  http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052702304811304577368110112622548.html

Courts in  New Jersey (also NC, CT, FL, NY and other states) are awarding alimony to the lower paying spouse that is sometimes 50, 60, even 140% of the higher paying spouse's GROSS income.  And often, this alimony is awarded for life! 

How is this possible you ask?  The courts demand that women maintain the "..Same standard of living [she] enjoyed during the marriage."  So if the ex-wife tells the court she enjoyed manicures, spa visits, a cleaning lady, landscapers, etc., then the courts will require her ex-husband to pay for that lifestyle through alimony.  Often, this alimony is awarded FOR LIFE!  So the husband is unable to date, unable to afford his own apartment, unable to meet his own basic needs because he must obey the law or face warrants! 

SHOULDN'T A WIFE RECEIVE ALIMONY IF SHE WAS ONCE SUPPORTED (EVEN IN PART) BY HER HUSBAND?   YES!!!!!  A woman should receive enough alimony to become re-educated, have time to search for a job, find childcare and yes, even enjoy a period of time where she receives both a paycheck and alimony.  But the reality is closer to what you will read in this article where one woman was awarded about 140% of her husband's income!  http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052970204603004577271821665524012.html

Why is this Important Now?  We're in the midst of the great recession.  Some of these higher earning spouses have been laid off. They’ve run out of unemployment.  They've used their retirement monies to pay alimony and now they owe the IRS fees and penalties.  These guys are living with their parents or other loved ones.  They’re destitute. And what are the courts doing to assist these men? They’re requiring them to continue making outrageous payments or face warrants.  They expect men to hire lawyers and undergo a protracted legal battle in which they are awarded at best, a temporary reprieve from paying alimony while the courts expect them to get re-employed earning the same money they did before the recession.  (BTW, do YOU know anyone making the same amount of money they did before the recession?!)  

Someone I know struggles to pay alimony 3 years after losing his job.  He's used his retirement savings to cover alimony and now owes the IRS penalties and fees for taking money from his retirement account.  His ex-wife, undaunted by his plight, insists there is money hidden somewhere and is demanding it.  Despite raw numbers that show all of his money went to her, the ex-wife insists the math is irrelevant.  She's demanding he prove he's not hiding anything.  What a standard!  

Sign this petition and let officials in your state know that they cannot ignore the plight of these men!  Woman can't demand equal rights in the workplace while also demanding a lifetime of ex-husband funded welfare.

Keep men in their home states and stop driving them away with your draconian laws!



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