The bottom line: Protections for the parental rights of military members vary from state to state. While some states have made significant progress to protect the rights of military members called to serve either abroad or in our homeland, other states have laws that make it hard for service members to maintain their rights as parents. For instance, Colorado does not recognize the Army's Family Care Plan. The Army requires certain Soldiers (especially single parent Soldiers) to create a family care plan that details how the Soldier will provide care for their family when missions arise that cause the Soldier to be away for extended periods of time (i.e. deployments, extended field training exercises, National Guard drill periods, etc.). In the case of a deployment, the state of Colorado does not recognize this standardized plan as an agreement of temporary care, but rather believes that a single Soldier deploying in support of his or her Country has relinquished custody of his or her child(ren). Similarly, the state of Colorado does not count National Guard training and deployment requirements as work related costs. The state believes that "work related" child care costs should only be calculated from 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. and only from Monday to Friday. Any care a Soldier has to provide for his or her child beyond that period is not calculated into the cost for child support even though Soldiers in the National Guard are required to train for one weekend a month. Soldiers in the military (specifically the Army National Guard) have to fight for their child(ren) and they must fight for their Country, but when called to support the state or the Nation, Colorado will not fight for these same Soldiers.

Discussion: As a single parent, and like most single parents, my child is now and will always be my number one priority. Her health, safety, and well-being will always be put before that of my own. Please imagine yourself in my boots as a single parent with a child you love more than anything in the world. Your home is in Colorado and you are also a Soldier in the Wyoming Army National Guard. You were court ordered 100% custody of your child and as a single parent Soldier, you develop your signed Family Care Plan with the non-custodial parent in belief that this document would give you the peace of mind that your child will always be able to receive appropriate care in your absence whether it be for weekend drill, annual training, or deployment.

In Colorado, this is not the case. Colorado does not recognize a parent with a Family Care Plan retaining custody of his or her child(ren) when they leave for military training or deployment.

In August 2019, I was told by the Colorado State Child Support Office that because my child was left to a third party (in accordance with my Family Care Plan) while I was called to serve on a 9-month deployment to a combat zone with the Wyoming Army National Guard, that I relinquished custody of her. Not only that, but the individual I designated as the temporary care giver received a call from the state telling them to file for child support from both myself AND the non-custodial parent. The state requested this with complete disregard to the arrangements set forth in the Family Care Plan as well as complete disregard to financial arrangements already set in place.

Furthermore, the Colorado State Child Support office also stated that they do not recognize a Single, Full-Time parent as being able to justify paying for the care of his or her child outside of standard weekday work hours: Monday-Friday from 9-5. They informed me that they will not calculate nights/weekends paid to a nanny, child care, in home daycare, or otherwise during Drill and AT weekends because it is not standard. They also stated that they don't believe that Drill Weekends or Deployment are "work related."

Recommendation: Colorado Legislature should make efforts to change policy to better support Single, Full Time Mothers and Fathers that also serve our Country. They and all states need to fully recognize Family Care Plans as temporary arrangements and not a relinquishment of custody. Most importantly, the state as well as the rest of the country should recognize the costs we Soldiers pay in service of the citizens of the United States of America, costs paid while serving both overseas and Stateside.