In April 2024 unbeknown to me, my Father, a patient at a hospital just 10 minutes away from my home had passed away. Despite my contact information being fully known, no one took the time to inform me of either his illness or his death until August of the same year, a fact in terms of ethics I continue to struggle with as well as the grief of his death.

The news came in a brief 2nd class signed for letter with only the minimal of details at a date of convenience. The 2nd class stamp ironically being somehow symbolic in terms of both the letter as well as familiar standing. I was neither informed of either the date or type of funeral that took place in this letter. The funeral, as I later discovered through my own resolve, was not publicised and details were shared by invite only.  While distant relatives from abroad were invited and in attendance, I was denied both notification and the chance to attend his funeral and therefore robbed of the opportunity to say my final goodbye to a Father that I deeply loved and always will. 

I lived with the loss of my Father's presence, after my parents divorced during my youth and subsequently spent years seeking a relationship with both my Father and his 2nd family who I accepted without issue.  Nothing was strained, just sporadic until contact ceased, this being after I asked for information regarding my Father's past which remained unacknowledged. 

At the end of the day, he was and always will be my Father, one that I  loved. To be denied any regard or respect in terms of being notified of my Father's passing has deeply hurt and left me with an inability to understand both the why and the acceptability of such behaviour in today's society.  An action neither merited or justifiable under any guise. I didn't find this unique to me, my sibling received no communication at all and as such was also denied any respect or rights. Given the choice, we would have liked to have said our goodbyes and been afforded the closure that we rightly deserved.

Ethically and morally, everyone should have the right to be both formally advised and afforded the right to attend their parents funeral adult or child.  If there is a legal obligation to notify state departments there must be a legal obligation to notify the deceased's children who are also known to the state and surviving relatives. It must not be left to the convenience or inconvenience of others. 

This petition calls for the adoption of a law imposing a legal obligation on either the state or the surviving spouse/relatives to inform children when a death certificate has been issued for their parent, and before the funeral takes place. Approximately 800,000 people lose their parents annually in the UK, many of whom may often face similar situations. It's time our policy catches up to the emotional reality of these cases. 

This important legislation would ensure that children are given the respect and consideration they deserve during these devastating times. No child should be kept in the dark about the loss of a parent, let alone be deprived of the opportunity to give a final farewell to their deceased parent.

Children deserve the right to grieve, to attend their parent's funeral, and to part ways with their beloved in a way that provides closure. Let us not forget that they are also the ones who carry forward the legacy of their parents. Join us in fighting for this change by signing this petition. Ensure the early notification of a parent's death becomes a legal obligation, and not a discretionary decision left to another's convenience.