Alex Lee Wright-Porter was born at 22 weeks gestation on Sunday, June 10th 2012, at 10.12 am through early onset of labour. He was perfect and healthy in every way, and he looked just like his Daddy. He was 30cm tall, and weighed 570 grams. He was my first baby, and he was stillborn.
I was unsure as to if I would get a birth certificate, death certificate, both, or none. I knew that there was paper work, but it was weeks before I got over my shock and devastation enough to think about it.
An online support group I joined warned me that I would get a certificate of birth listing Alex as stillborn. The ladies also made a comment about the front page, and how seeing the "beautiful happy, healthy smiling babies on the front cover" was like twisting the knife so soon after such a terrible loss.
Thanks to their warning, I was semi-prepared for the form -- but others won’t be. There are six photos of happy smiling babies on the front. It’s multicultural, respecting Australia’s diversity -- but not mums like me and others. This needs to change.
It may sound like a small thing -- but when you’re still reeling from shock and grief, seeing the a front cover like this traumatised me all over again. That’s why I’m asking for the government to provide neutral or separate, respectful forms for stillbirths and neonatal deaths.
I know nothing with bring my precious son back. But I hope that by speaking out, I can make things just a little more bearable for parents like me in the future. Please sign my petition.
~ In memory of my son Alex Lee Wright - Porter 10/06/2012 x
Please make a second respectful Birth Registration Statement
I want Birth Deaths and Marriages to make a respectful Birth Registration Statement specifically designed for parents of babies that are still born or suffered a neonatal death. The current statement is designed for parents of living babies and the Victorian one has smiling babies all over the front of it. I want a respectful second form for parents that have lost a baby through still birth or neonatal deaths. As it is in Australia there are estimated to be 6 still born babies birthed each day, thats about 42 a week let alone how many die with in the neonatal time frame.
~ In memory of Alex Lee Wright - Porter 10/06/2012