Dearest Ye/Yeezy/Yeezus/Kanye/Mr West,

Here at the University of St Andrews we have this thing called a student union, and at this student union we have a very special drink: the Pablo. Made with magic and students' tears (aka WKD & Smirnoff), the Pablo comes in a variety of flavors including Blue, White, Green, and Yellow, and is described by some students as being "death for £5". It is the 7th food group for all St Andrews students and we'd be delighted to share one (or five) with you.

In honor of your newest 30/10 album (suck-it Pitchfork), "The Life of Pablo", we'd like to cordially invite you to come have some Pablos with us at the Union. To further entice you, we'll let you wear one of our red gowns and walk on our pier. We can also pull some other hundreds-of-years-old traditions out of our asses as well just for the giggles. Wiley may claim that St Andrews is "the middle of nowhere", but we're really good at getting drunk off of Pablos and doing karaoke versions of your smash single, "Gold-Digger". Basically, there's no better place to celebrate Pablo and his life.

Please respond at your earliest convenience. 

Sending mad love and good vibes, 
The Students of St Andrews

P.S. #YEEZYSEASON3 #PablosWithKanye

P.P.S. Prince William and Duchess Catherine went here, but really, "What's a (future) king to a god"???