My name is Jessica and I'm 24 years old. When I was 12-13 years old I spent ten months in Great Ormond Street's Mildred Creak Unit. This is an inpatient mental health unit for children and young people with a variety of mental health and physical health concerns. One of the main groups of young people the MCU aims to 'treat' is those with complex, chronic physical health concerns such as ME and CRPS. 

When I was admitted I had a diagnosis of Hypermobility Disorder and Autism. My autism diagnosis was completely overlooked during my admission, as staff believed that if I believed I was autistic I would 'limit myself'. This led to a lack of understanding of my individual needs and many years of struggling to understand myself as my important diagnosis had been unjustly taken away, despite several ADOS assessments confirming my diagnosis. My chronic pain and stomach complaints were ignored and brushed off as 'just anxiety'. I have since found out I suffer from severe gastroparesis, which means my stomach is partially paralysed, making eating and drinking very difficult as I suffer from frequent vomiting, nausea and pain. I had an important gastro appt during the early days on my time on the MCU. When the MCU found out about this appt they contacted the consultant and put a stop to my treatment plan and any further appts with this consultant, as they implied I had exaggerated or fabricated my symptoms. I now live with severe complications of gastroparesis which affect my everyday life. I could have received help sooner, had the MCU not put a stop to important medical treatment that could have greatly improved my quality of life. I was told to 'stop wearing' specially prescribed glasses and my mother was belittled and talked down to for using a wheelchair for me, despite medical recommendation to do so. I now use a wheelchair half of the time, due to my condition progressing due to the lack of earlier support to get me the correct help. 

This has frequently happened to other children and young people, with conditions including Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, Epilepsy and CRPS. The MCU has even taken parents to court to get children removed from their parents' care when parents disagree that their child's illness is not solely psychosomatic. 

The ward culture and environment is and was abusive, with children and young people forced to be the therapists to their peers. For example, at meal times, young people are 'encouraged' to support their peers who have severe eating disorders. If a young person is not sure what to say to support their peer, or if there is a conversation at the dinner table which isn't centered around encouraging a young person to eat, the other young people are shamed and humiliated, with comments such as 'don't you care that your peer is struggling?' directed at children as young as 8 years old, who are expected to be the therapeutic support to their peers who have complex mental health needs. Young people were forced to wake up their chronically ill peers by banging pots and pans in their bedroom to get them out of bed. Young people were expected to be there for their peers in a way that went well beyond friendly care and support. Young people were expected to take on a role that would usually require years of training as an adult. 

After my ten month admission to MCU I was placed in a 'therapeutic' boarding school, through no choice of my own. MCU frequently used the motto of 'if you do the work, you get to go home'. For those with eating disorders, that meant 'if you eat and follow your meal plan, you get to go home'. I frequently asked what it meant for those of us, like myself, who had less clear goals to achieve during our admission. I was never given a clear answer of what it was I had to do to go home. I worked hard and did everything I was told by staff, even when it went against what felt right for me. And still I was placed in a school completely inappropriate for my needs. When I told staff 'I'll work hard at this school so I can go home', they told me that nothing I could do would get me home, as this school was now my permanent placement, where I would live until age 19, receiving poor education and in a chaotic environment, the other side of the country from my home, friends and family. Thankfully I left the school after a year, but it was a year of my life I will never get back, which left me with trauma that will last a lifetime. The MCU have since admitted the decision to send me to this school was a mistake, however I have never received a formal apology or any form of compensation, despite the huge costs to my wellbeing and financial costs incurred by frequent travel back and forth to a school several hours away from home. 

The MCU believed I was isolated due to being homeschooled, with the ward psychiatrist, Jon Goldin, claiming my communication struggles were due to being shut away at home all day with no one but my mother. This was untrue, and I regularly told staff on the MCU about the many social activities I had done prior to being placed on the MCU, and all the friends I was being kept away from during my admission. The MCU decided that instead of sending me home where I could maintain my social connections and friendships, they would send me to an isolated boarding school with my only social connections being other traumatised young people with severely complex needs, who displayed violence and aggression. I had all independence taken away from me, for reasons that have never been explained to me, and I lost vital social connections and friendships that had meant a lot to me. 

The MCU has done this to countless families. They have accused parents of Munchausens and FII, despite evidence from other medical professionals to the contrary. So many of us have fought for justice, just to be laughed at and silenced. Please, support me to hold Jon Goldin and the MCU team accountable for their neglect and abuse of young people and their families.