Hi, my name is Cortnee R. Eaglen,I'm 33 years old and im currently incarcerated at Denver Womans Correctional Facility for a 35 year sentence. I'm writing this petition with the hopes to obtain enough signatures to get a clemency review. I was convicted of conspiracy to commit first degree murder after my co-defendant made a decision that would indelibly change the lives of many forever. On June 29.2017 during a heated discussion my co defendant shot a man named Jesse inside of a motel room when the man made a sudden movement that startled him. I was outside in the car when this transpired, unaware of what had taken place. My co defendant took the stand at his trail detailing his actions that led to a young mans life being
taken. I thought i knew the man who was with me, thinking he wasn't capable of things such as murder.. So the outcome never crossed my mind to be a possibility. When he came back to the car and told me the murder had happened I didn't think. I reacted. I drove away at full speed. Partially due to shock, more so due to an unhealthy understanding of what loyalty looked like to me. The magnitude of what had transpired hadn't actually hit me yet. I was high and everything was numb. Over the next few days the longer I went without sleep and the more i thought about what happened the more it ate at me. But I didn't Know what to do. My whole life I have given men and friends all that I wish I could find just one person to give to me; True
love, loyalty, understanding, forgiveness, and someone that will stay no matter what. So although I wasn't ok with what happened, I stayed. I stayed like no one ever has for me. There are certain things that are ingrained in you when you live the life I had lived for so long. Things that until that situation i didn't know where going to eat me up and turn out to be my biggest regrets. A man lost his life and that does not sit lightly on my conscience. Its a mistake that can never be taken back, If i know one thing its that I had to change, for the loss Jesse's family feels every moment of every day and for Jesses name and memory. If I continued on the path of drugs, ignorance, and bad decisions then he truly died in vain. Since I've been incarcerated ive been in situations that have challenged me to repeat old behaviors that got me here and during those times I showed not only others but more importantly myself that i am not the same person that brought me to prison. That the principals I once stood by are no longer the same. The loyalty to the streets and to the "game" that
I once carried are no longer there. The loyalty I possess has been redirected to where it should have always been... To myself and to my two sons. Being here has humbled me in a way that no other experience ever could have. I have learned that
there are true consequences for my actions that not only effect me but more importantly my sons. Being a mother incarcerated has created a handicap of love and affection that only a mother has the ability to provide: Which in turn produced a void in my sons' life that they have sought to fill with anything and everything. My oldest son, now 14 years old, has turned to the street life and is now battling legal issues of his own. My younger son, now 12 years old is willing to give up on life altogether because the feelings of being left behind, unwanted, forgotten and alone are stronger than wanting to live without his mother. I have watched them both go in and out of psychiatric hospitals and Juvenile detention centers and progressively go downhill and all i can provide are words of love, encouragement, comfort, and discipline hoping that will be enough without being able to physically be there.
While incarcerated I am striving to gain the knowledge and experience to be able to start and maintain a youth advocacy center. I believe we have to catch our children at a young age to form their thinking process and decision making abilities so it becomes a habit to make the right choices in difficult circumstances. I'm doing this by participating in multiple classes including;;; Alternatives to violence, Victims impact, Strategies for self improvement and change, Advanced Academic Achievements, Moral Recognition Therapy, Cognitive Behavior therapy, and Dialectic behavioral therapy. I've been a member of Women of Influence for 3 years, which is a organization that offers workshops centered around effective communication, budgeting, boundaries, goal setting, mentoring, and much more. We also donate to multiple organizations within the community. I have also taken several trade courses to be able to expand my knowledge and to be able to help the youth to understand the value and importance of work ethic. 

With a new outlook on life i now realize that while i was doing bad things i was justified doing them for the "right reasons". I now know this is not true, there's no right reason to do the wrong things and the right thing is always the hardest thing to do. I didn't think there could or would be long term consequences for my actions, now I see there are and they are not worth it. And these are the lessons I try to teach my sons everyday. All this and more have opened my eyes to my future and if I'm granted clemency/commutation I will gladly work for minimum wage and make an honest living and leave a legacy that my children and Jesse's family would be proud of. I would give my kids all my time rather then gifts and material things because i see now that time is what means the most. Since I've been incarcerated I have chosen to feel all the pain and loss that I was once determined to numb with drugs. I have processed the death of my sister which was the root of the lifestyle I was living and have come a long way in my opinions towards drugs. They are no longer necessary or desired. I get more positive feelings when i pass a random UA then i ever would by getting high. I have my emotions under control and i no longer ride that emotional roller coaster or have the impulsive desires that drugs once gave me. I have pride within myself I've never had and i intend to continue this drug free life inside or out. I see now that living a honest drug free life carries more pleasure and less stress and i want this honest life that i live here and now, but to live it with my sons. I want to teach them to be the best men that i know they can be through my experiences and my mistakes and to prevent them from walking the same path as i did. I cant change my past but i can make my future, as well as theirs, better. In Jesses memory. 

Please sign this petition and help me get home to my sons! Thank you for taking the time to read this petition! Any questions or comments please contact me through my friend Sela James at selajames@outlook.com. (Soon Cortnee will have her own email set up, i will add it once i finish making it)