Teach the crabs to read

Recent signers:
Zoë van Laethem and 12 others have signed recently.

The Issue

We should teach crabs to read so they can learn how to speak. The crabs are clearly intellectually superior to humans, so one day the crabs will be able to speak their thoughts and tell us how to help the human race. Also, if you don't like someone then you could have a crab go into their house and take notes and spy on them and eventually pinch them.

Snakes are one of the many enemies to crabs. It is just the natural cycle. Teaching crabs to read can really improve the crab's well being as well as humans. But if we taught crabs to read then they could tell the snakes to stop being rude and then they wouldn't have an enemy to that species anymore.

I mean, crabs are already really smart so why not make them smarter? If we taught crabs to read we could have them sit in classrooms and explain books to children. They could also help scientists learn more about their species and other species they interact with. Like dolphins and sharks.

Teaching the crabs to read would benefit both humanity and crabs

163

Recent signers:
Zoë van Laethem and 12 others have signed recently.

The Issue

We should teach crabs to read so they can learn how to speak. The crabs are clearly intellectually superior to humans, so one day the crabs will be able to speak their thoughts and tell us how to help the human race. Also, if you don't like someone then you could have a crab go into their house and take notes and spy on them and eventually pinch them.

Snakes are one of the many enemies to crabs. It is just the natural cycle. Teaching crabs to read can really improve the crab's well being as well as humans. But if we taught crabs to read then they could tell the snakes to stop being rude and then they wouldn't have an enemy to that species anymore.

I mean, crabs are already really smart so why not make them smarter? If we taught crabs to read we could have them sit in classrooms and explain books to children. They could also help scientists learn more about their species and other species they interact with. Like dolphins and sharks.

Teaching the crabs to read would benefit both humanity and crabs

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163


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Petition created on August 15, 2020