First year of University I didn't sleep for the last week of the 'summer holiday' worrying about starting University with a Chronic illness no wait I don't have it anymore with crippling social anxiety. My good old mum and dad drove me to University I strut in with my light blue logo sweater of QMU off to the Student bar Maggies. Excitement in my veins the uni bar looks good and fun I wonder how often I will be here. Turns out barely in my 3 years, certainty not enough anyway but I tried my best. My dad desperate for the Uni food lol! and a beer. Me and mum shared chips and a burger and I had a cider. Then off to halls I had stayed in halls at Uni but you worry if you ll get too tired, mentally the anxiety goes round and round like my new companion black shadow and hynena in the corner, whispering, shouting wanting to run and shout but wanting to hide and not talk to anyone. Will anyone like me? Will they find me too shy? Is going with my parents odd as I am 27 years old now lol. Does everyone do this or just me, I am sure we are all worried carrying our baggage round. I am probably too hard on myself I am prone for that berattling myself to a shell of a person to always to my best A star you say when I am barely getting by,  Picassco, always looking for his faults as of yet to see the Brilliant character below him shining in strength and power. You see her falling and lost one day but the next excitement of moving on of something new fights her inner core untill she lashes out in fury determination. She will get this done she will do her best she will be the best. No failing nothing is lost on her, she feels the gravity become her. She pushes out the failure and lost soul who thinks she is incapable she proves to you the world she was not lost she could do this better each day, each life, each chapter. She makes you see positivity, savor each moment. I am the power she roars, with thunder in the blood, as determined as one. To get over an illness is one thing but to get over mental blockage after mental blockage that feels that it cannot be undone. To see people who they really are, struggling strangers, you are liked, you are one. Push, Push, Push till you lift you out of there and all you see is strength and power. I never stay in one place, I need new challenges new adventures, I shed a skin and come alive whilst disagreeing and disapproving I change and I grow and I let it all go.

Poem about Chronic Fatigue and Recovery.

Be Bold, Be Lucky, Be Driven.