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I’m petitioning to require an advocate in the hospital room with every woman (parent) who has just lost their child, whether it be in any stage pregnancy or due to accident, injury, etc. An advocate who will act as a witness and a third party in the room with the doctor as they’re given their options. Whether that be to induce, perform a D&C, etc. And will stand in the room and explain in detail what that will look like, if you have the right to other options that weren’t given to you, what the risks are to each decision, and will help you get a second opinion if necessary. Someone who will take the time to answer any questions or concerns you may have with any given option and will have you sign a paper that says you’ve received and understand the information and you’re choosing “___” option. And will give you a copy of that paperwork BEFORE the procedure or treatment begins. Someone who is not rushed and is there specifically to insure that you understand your rights, your options, your risks. You only get one chance, one opportunity to make these decisions that can never be taken back. Everyone deserves the right to fully understand what those decisions are and the impact it will have on your life.
We unexpectedly lost our daughter at 15 weeks into my pregnancy. We were not given all of the options available. We did not understand what risk came with the only option we were given. We did not have a professional in the room to insure that our records were correctly transcribed. We did not receive our daughter’s remains because we were told that was not possible. But all it required was a signature on a request form. We did not know any of this because we did not have someone advocating for us. We lost the ONE single opportunity we had to hold our daughter, to take a part of her home with us, to receive foot and handprints. We went home with nothing. We didn’t have a medical professional there to witness our rights being violated. We didn’t have someone there to insure we understood our options completely or that we had a right to a second opinion. It’s too easy to be violated in a vulnerable situation. I can not get my daughter back or my ability to hold her or receive her remains to bring her home with us. But I will fight to make sure this is not allowed to continue to happen to anyone else.
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