I write you today out of a broken heart. Worn from the battle already ensued. Weary for the fight ahead. My 22 year old daughter is suffering from mental illness that plagues so many in our society, yet the system in place says there’s nothing that can be done. I refuse to believe that. I can’t accept it. Something must change.

Since August, we have turned over every possible rock to seek help for our adult child who doesn’t see the need for help. Despite the delusions, paranoia, and lost connection to reality, we were told, “You’re just waiting for something bad to happen. Then we [the authorities] can intervene. She has to become a violent threat to herself or others before we can do anything.” A nurse pointed out, “In Missouri, it’s not against the law to be psychotic.” What happens when the current psychotic episode turns into a prolonged psychotic endeavor that slowly swallows her completely? What happens when the visual delusions prevent her from eating and she resembles more of a skeleton than her former self? Who advocates for these when they can’t advocate for themselves?

One might answer family, and I agree. However, Missouri law fails terribly to protect our mentally ill by allowing family guardianship. Bottom line. Missouri is a nightmare to pull off adult guardianship in. The current laws support the individual’s autonomy, but do nothing for the families who just want help before it’s too late. The families must watch mental illness torment their loved ones as they slip further and further into lonely darkness. The light that once shone bright is being snuffed out by paranoia and false realities.

Now, I understand the importance of maintaining an individual’s civil rights. I’m not advocating for total annihilation of a person’s freedoms. I am advocating for adult guardianship once the adult clearly is unable to make safe decisions for oneself. Obtaining guardianship in Missouri should not be likened to climbing Mt. Everest. A loving family member should be allowed to easily advocate for one who can’t see the need for help.

My daughter, once upon a time, smiled, laughed, played with her siblings, hugged her parents, and set her sights on life-long goals. Now, she isolates herself, talks to “people” that aren’t there, doesn’t eat because she sees worms in her food, and whole-heartedly believes she is the rightful heir to the Russian throne. She went missing four days before Mother’s Day. A missing person’s report was filed on Mother’s Day 2022. She was found thirteen days later, wandering a rural highway in the middle of Michigan. She identified herself as the Queen of Russia to responding state troopers, and was taken to the ER for evaluation. It took the hard working officials in Michigan 12 hours to identify her. She was transferred to the first available bed in a Michigan psychiatric facility. There she remained noncommunicative for FIVE days. Since she’s 22, I was told nothing, and am still being told nothing. My daughter can’t advocate for herself. The hospital wasn’t advocating for her. Cedar Creek Psychiatric Hospital’s “safe plan” for discharge was to be released to the nearest homeless shelter with no money, food, phone, or family support system. I involved Michigan Adult Protective Services so someone would be advocating for her to receive treatment. Michigan Adult Protective Services agent quickly concluded that she is in no way capable of making safe decisions for herself. Why couldn’t Missouri do so? Why did she have to wander thirteen hours away for someone to see what her family has seen and reported for months?

I have been advised by Michigan APS to obtain emergency guardianship so we can figure out how to get my daughter home safely. In Michigan, this takes the signature of two doctors and is a form a parent can file without a lawyer. This is NOT the case in Missouri. A lawyer is definitely needed to navigate the mess of Missouri adult guardianship. Missouri legal counsel advised me to have Michigan make her a ward of their state. This would increase our likelihood of securing guardianship by then transferring it from Michigan to me. THAT’s our best chances?? Michigan judges won’t do so because she’s not a resident of Michigan. Missouri officials either can’t or don’t know how to help us since she’s not currently in Missouri. Michigan APS is advocating that she remain at Cedar Creek Psychiatric Hospital until we can secure guardianship. I learned today that Cedar Creek does indeed plan on turning her out without any ID, money, phone, or family support to the homeless shelter as soon as a bed becomes available. When this happens, she will be lost once again, vulnerable in every way.

My daughter can’t just be stuck in limbo between the two states. Something must be done. She matters. Something must change. The mentally ill population matters. Do something. BRING HER HOME.

Implore Missouri's elected officials to change adult guardianship laws regarding the mentally ill so families can advocate for them once they can no longer advocate for themselves. Call Missouri's elected officials to serve the mentally ill that suffers in silence, unaware of the treatment needed and the full life that awaits.