When I was a wee lad, perhaps no more than four years as it was the summer of 2011, my mother took me to a Dunkin’ Donuts™️. At this momentous occasion, from within my vehicle in an outdoor line known as the “Drive Through”, something on the luminous menu caught my attention…

There, in all of its glory, stood a glorious, beautiful, star spangled pastry, in the very shape itself. With beautiful, oozing, jelly deliciousness flowing from within (unfortunately NOT hailing from the North Eastern region of Boston, Massachusetts, which I believe would perhaps be more patriotic, as opposed to a fruit compote) a striking the pallet with the most sugary, fruitful delight you may ever experience. And atop this confection, sat a  buttercream with hints of vanilla and chemical manufacturing, and the most gorgeous colors of all to any American citizen: Red, White, and Blue.

These shades are represented on sugary nibblets known as “sprinkles”. The sizes and shapes vary, almost similarly to the individualities of each citizen, in orbal, pill-like, and star formed renditions.

Overall, these come together to make a wonderful treat, well deserving to abide in its home of the Land of the Free. It is a patriotic feat in itself that such a being was created.

Of course, this delicious baked good had to take inspiration from not only our wonderful nation, but also a cultural icon: Captain America, of the famed Marvel comic books. He is a world renowned figure due to his loyalty and heroic ventures in his fictional world, an inspiration to all. I believe there was no better way to honor such a man, at the release of his titular film in 2011, Captain America: The First Avenger, than such a delight.

I beg and plead for the Dunkin’ Donuts™️ corporation to bring us back this magnificent achievement in both confectionery creation and honor. With this petition, I exercise my rights. My creation of this petition represents the opportunity I have been presented with the First Amendment, my right to speak out and protest freely for my cause. Please. Please, Dunkin’ Donuts™️. Not just for me, but for the people too. 

Thank you. God Bless America.