it was 13 minutes to 10 on a mid winter's evening. i was #chillaxin on my dfs sofa-recliner ahh whilst having a wee chit chat with one of my confederates. however, to my utmost dismay and devastation, i was greeted with a WhatsApp™ notification, hereby containing an inauspicious voice message dun dun dun, (therefore cultivating a suspenseful and mysterious atmosphere as one seeks to disc-) whereby my elderly relative was helplessly gasping for air splutter whilst explaining that she had previously slumbered into acute cardiac arrest thud at the prospect of hearing such heart-wrenching news: that green green grass guy had been blacklisted from tiktok ! gasp 

i find this ordeal rather despicable tut tut as although we may be receiving great-grandmother irene's heritable heirlooms haaalelujah! and bank-account boosting wills (with which i will most undoubtedly be investing in nfts with), it doesn't dismiss the steadfast fact that for starters we have lost such a treasured family member (quite literally treasured, with all the money ill be spending on my future eclectic collection of jelvis album covers!) and most importantly, the fact that we have lost green green grass guy has distilled my prior non-existent faith in humanity and i fear that the end is most certainly nigh

#justiceforgreengreengrassguy