Petition Closed
Petitioning barack obama and 1 other

Do whatever it takes to get Gedion Zelalem to the US National Team

1,219
Supporters

Let's be honest. Soccer in the United States has come a long way, but that doesn't mean we're beneath using any tactic possible to convince players to join the US National Team. 

With that in mind, it's time to petition Barack Obama and Sunil Gulati to do whatever it takes to get Gedion Zelalem to the US National Team. Does that mean we'll have to fast-track citizenship? So be it. Does that mean we'll have to grease a few palms to get a passport for Gedion? I'm sure we could find a few crooked congressmen. Is Gedion Zelalem even eligible for the US National Team? Who knows? 

Let's break every rule and fully embrace as much governmental corruption as it takes to get Gedion Zelalem to the US National Team. The children are our future.

Letter to
barack obama
Sunil Gulati
We appreciate your positions as leaders of our nation, and we humbly ask you to turn your back on ethics and morality and do whatever it takes to get Gedion Zelalem to the US National Team. Because if we can't have him, someone else will take him. And they'll probably be Communists.