My name is Jack Vaughn, and I'm a 16 year veteran of the professional wrestling business. Over those 16 years, I've watched the sport that I love so dearly deteriorate into nothing more than a sideshow circus.

Unlike my peers, however, I've decided to take the stand that others are too afraid to take. I'm asking you, the professional wrestling fan, to help me get the super kick banned from professional wrestling and restore our sport to its former glory. We've watched as this once devastating maneuver has been reduced to nothing more than something for wrestlers to do when they can't think of anything better.

FACTS ABOUT THE SUPER KICK

• If the Super Kick were banned, independent wrestling shows would be 27% shorter, allowing you more time to complain about wrestling on social media.

• In 2019, only 1.7% of matches in which a Super Kick was used (98.3% of all matches) did the Super Kick successfully end the match. There is, of course, a 1.7% margin of error on this statistic.

• If Shawn Michaels were dead, he would be rolling in his grave.

• Once the Super Kick is banned, a projected 99.3% of untrained wrestlers would be forced out of wrestling due to not knowing any other moves.

WE WON'T STOP THERE!

Once we succeed in getting the super kick banned, we're going after everything else that has become over-saturated in the wrestling market, such as:

• The destroyer
• The double-stomp
• Bad forearm exchanges
• Wrestlers under 6'3"
• Smart marks
• Bullet Club t-shirts

I thank you in advance for your support, and would like you to remember a very simple, yet very impactful quote:

"If every kick is super, then no kick is super."

Thank you, and God bless America!