My name is Angela. I am a survivor of domestic abuse, currently going through the family courts. Going through a family court process is complicated and painful, though for survivors of domestic abuse, it can be deadly - a recent BBC report shows the number of women who have committed suicide after family court judgements, which have left their children in the care of their abusers, some of whom were convicted peadophiles. 

My experiences of domestic violence at the hands of my ex-husband have left me with complex post traumatic stress disorder and suicidal thoughts. My mental health issues have worsened while going through the family court system - where I wasn’t believed, was re-traumatised and the full risk of my ex partner to my family was not understood. Neither judges nor barristers have training on the realities of domestic abuse, and abusers rely on flawed psychiatric concepts like “parental alienation” to get what they want. 

Parental alienation, the idea that the mother is turning her children against their father through abuse allegations is being used across the country in family courts and is leading to children ending up in the care of abusers instead of their mothers. The United Nations, as well as leading figures in the UK legal sector have already called for an end to the use of the parental alienation defence in court. Training on domestic abuse - its  dynamics, behaviours and effects would give the judiciary the background they need to make the compassionate, well-informed decisions which survivors desperately need, so that us and our children aren’t subjected to further harm.

Understanding the risk that abusers pose, the tactics they use and the consequences of their behaviour can be the difference between life and death for survivors, and the difference between a child being abused or not. 

The abuse I experienced changed my life forever - please join me in calling for an end to parental alienation and training on domestic violence for the judiciary - to make sure that abuse survivors don’t suffer in court any more than we already have - it is the difference between life and death for so many.