The photo of us (I at left and my partner at right), taken when we began living together along with our children.   A  beautiful couple,… with so many great years together,… that sadly makes the horror 30 years later, that much more shocking.  The times were hard back then in 1993, when same sex couples had no protection under common-law. 

Below is the transcript of the 2018 video recording by a court certified transcriber. Because my partner and I had been arguing  at the time— she was using coercive control (gas-lighting) abuse against me, I then gathered up enough gumption to ask that we video record our argument given her previous tendency of changing her story later, claiming that I had misunderstood.  Thankfully this evidence is allowed at trial.  

MAY OCEAN: Okay so Cathy and I are having a little bit of a heated discussion. Of course, it
2 centres on Gillman. Gillman who continually said that I had, without being specific, ever, ever, or
3 his mother being specific, ever really, so I am trying to get down to the bottom of that, so the
4 situation is, again, he claims that I harmed him. And he’s been claiming that, well, since the
5 beginning of time, that I came into the picture and from my perspective, I have had to issue tough
6 love, because of his continual threats, for suicide and outbursts that are damaging to myself and
7 others, and I do understand that Cathy is his mother and has a bias strong towards him and again,
8 I have a daughter and I still issue tough love with her when she needed it and my son as well.
9 Anyhow, regardless of that I’m going to bring one situation, just one, only one situation that I
10 think was particularly harmful and it involves Gill when we went on a vacation out west, and we
11 were travelling up a mountain, and we stopped at a look off, where there was a wall, that
12 separated us and a sheer cliff, that, should anybody stand on that wall, would immediately be in
13 danger. Should they fall over it, it would be death. Okay. Gillman jumped on top of that wall and
14 he proceeded to walk along it, very dangerous. If he lost his balance, forget about what statement
15 he was making, and having done that in the first place, in front of his parents and Chris was
16 there, and my children. So there Gillman was, and we begged him at first to get off the cliff, as
17 this is inappropriate, this is bad behaviour, get off of the wall. Gillman would not, in fact he went
18 out of his way to make it worse. He started to twirl, he started to leap and run, all along the top of
19 the cliff, the wall. I am still having flashbacks, I understand that Cathy can harden her heart to
20 that, but I am terrorized by that. I value life, I sacrificed my own life to save another, why....I
21 can’t understand why it doesn’t terrorize others, but I said at that point in time, I said, Gillman,
1
 
 1 get down now or we’re leaving without you and he didn’t. I said, if became worse, so we just
2 continued. We got in the car, all of us, including Cathy, my children, got in the car, scared to shit
3 and drove off. If Gillman was going to die, I wasn’t prepared to watch it or expect my children to
4 be party to it. Luckily, Cathy came along. Now, we drove away, it was a little ways before we
5 came to the next look off, so Gillman, in order to get there, in the time that he did, had to have
6 ran, which means he was probably scared that we had left him and I thought, good, I’m glad you
7 got the little bit of fear on your side for a change, even though you can’t equate that fear of even
8 taking off in a vehicle to what could have been death, from what he had done.
9 Now, Cathy and I are sitting here and we’re talking about Gillman’s threats of death, which, by
10 the way, started when he was three. I did not come into the picture until he was almost 13. Cathy
11 and I moved in together about a month before his 13th birthday. So, he was old enough to know
12 the consequences of his actions and the harm his actions. Now I wanted to be, get very specific
13 with Cathy, because we always talk about the harm that Gillman feels happened to him but
14 there’s never been anything to point towards that except for when I’m sitting here now. This is
15 harmful to him and my thoughts are, how can it be harmful to him what I say about those times
16 that he did, how can that be harmful? I’m trying to heal us all, and by equated as what, as saying
17 this and talking about this now, as equal, I ask Cathy very specifically, what did I do that was
18 equal to his being up on that ledge, what happened? And Cathy said, this, my talking like this,
19 and here’s Cathy to tell you that.
20 CATHY BENNETT: I’d like to explain what the situation is. Gillman has said to me that he
21 feels that May has abused him over the years, verbally, not physically, and right now he’s at the
2
 
 1 point where he’s been to therapy, he’s had all kinds of time to try to deal with situations and get
2 over it, and at this point, he does not want to talk to May, or be around May, it just...he can’t get
3 over it, he’s hurting.
4 MAY OCEAN: Can I stop for one minute?
5 CATHY BENNETT: Sure.
6 MAY OCEAN: Do I want to be around Gillman?
7 CATHY BENNETT: Well, I thought that this was the issue that was bothering you was that...
8 MAY OCEAN: No.
9 CATHY BENNETT: Why does he feel, you know, how can he feel....I think what you’re
10 saying is how can he be justified to say that and...
11 MAY OCEAN: I don’t want to be around him, you know that, I’ve made...
12 CATHY BENNETT: Okay.
13 MAY OCEAN: that clear. You’re the one that wants us to get over it, but anyhow, go on. So
14 I’m specifically saying....
15 CATHY BENNETT: Well, then, okay, if that’s the case, I don’t feel, you know, then that if
16 that’s the case, if he feels he doesn’t want to be around you and you don’t want to be around him
17 then, you know, at this point, I’m not sure what the major, well, I think it’s very uncomfortable,
18 very hurtful, I think it’s very damaging that both you and Gill feel that way and that you can’t
19 really get over it, and so anyway, but May is very upset because she has been putting words in
20 my mouth to try to say that I don’t think that what Gill did was harmful, I don’t condone any...
3
          
 1 MAY OCEAN: That’s not what I said. I asked you very specifically, what do you find equal to
2 that, in horror and terror.
3 CATHY BENNETT: And I don’t find it equal.
4 MAY OCEAN: Okay, you didn’t say that earlier.
5 CATHY BENNETT: I’m trying to explain...
6 MAY OCEAN: You didn’t say that earlier, you told....did you tell me...
7 CATHY BENNETT: I’m trying to explain...
8 MAY OCEAN: Did you, no, stop, stop.
9 CATHY BENNETT: This is the exact thing...
10 MAY OCEAN: Did you say just a minute ago
11 CATHY BENNETT: Is it still running?
12 MAY OCEAN: Yes, it’s still running. Did you not tell me, you’re lying now because you told
13 me a minute ago that it was equal. Now you’re changing your story.
14 CATHY BENNETT: I did not
15 MAY OCEAN: Do you not understand? Holy shit.
16 CATHY BENNETT: Okay.
17 MAY OCEAN: You’re changing your story. You were gonna put it on record, you were gonna
18 put it on...okay.

CERTIFICATE OF COURT TRANSCRIBER
I, Lisa Shepherd, Court Transcriber, hereby certify that I have transcribed the foregoing, and that it is a true and accurate transcript of the recording given in this matter, taken by way of electronic audio recording.
5
 Dartmouth, Nova Scotia April 16, 2023
Lisa Shepherd
(Signed electronically) ___________________________________ Lisa Shepherd (Registration No. 2022-003)