And yet the financial abuse continues....
For over four weeks, through mediation and through my solicitor, I have begged for one simple protection: an undertaking that neither of us would apply for the final divorce order until our finances were resolved. A basic safeguard. A moment of fairness. A chance to breathe.He refused. Every time, it was “no.” In mediation, in solicitor emails.
He ignored every attempt to resolve this like adults.
I was left with no choice but to apply for a court order - £190 each, plus legal fees. Money neither of us needed to waste, but he pushed it to that point.
He was warned, please sign the undertaking or we go to court and seek costs from him.
He ignored that too. So I then applied. The court approved a date. I paid the court fees.
And only THEN — once the official letter landed on his doorstep — did he suddenly decide to sign the undertaking.
Too late. Too calculated. Too familiar.
I had to protect myself. I have nothing left. He took everything from me in pure spite. He even tried to take my children out of my care with lies so cruel they still make my stomach turn. Thankfully, the court and local authorities saw through it eventually. But now he’s trying to take my future too — the assets I worked for my entire life. I bought my first home at 18. I built myself long before he ever came along.
And yet he still tries to drag me down.
We were asked by the mediator to disclose our finances and get three valuations each for the family home the home he wants to buy me out.
His highest valuation? £5,000 LESS than what we paid six years ago.
Mine? £65,000 MORE.
Just another attempt to devalue what we built — what I built — for his own financial gain.
He forgets the truth.
We were only able to but that house because of the sale of MINE and MY MUMS home.
He had nothing when I met him.
He was drowning in debt, practically homeless, and broken from gambling. I helped rebuild his life. And now I’m the one left homeless, staying in a friend’s house with nothing to my name.
He won’t even let me have our daughter’s child benefit so I can get a two‑bed council place to be nearer to her school.
Meanwhile, I’m drowning in over £30,000 of debt — legal fees, loans, credit cards — all caused because of him.
And tomorrow, he’ll receive £345 in child maintenance for a son he leaves alone while he drives an hour away to see his girlfriend most days. A son he has turned against me. A son he has involved in our divorce. A son he has used as a pawn in our business — a business he lied about selling, a business he tries to hide using his friends business' name. I have caught him at numerous events and have it all evidenced
And it doesn’t stop there.
His father and stepmother are helping him hide assets. Suspicious transactions. Motorbikes. Money moving around every month. More layers of financial control. More people enabling the abuse.
What confuses me most is that he lived through this as a child. He watched his own mother struggle, cry most nights, work three jobs at one point, and survive without a penny from his Dad.
He saw the damage financial abuse causes.
And yet he repeats the same cycle — only now he uses our children as leverage.
I refuse to be destroyed like this.
I refuse to be silenced.
I refuse to let anyone else go through this alone.
I need your support more than ever.
Please sign my petition — not just for me, but for the thousands of people suffering financial and coercive abuse after separation. We deserve protection. We deserve justice. We deserve a voice.