My name is Reo Cupid Payne and I am a river. I have been battling gender dysphoria since I was 10 years old. It has been rough, discouraging, and draining. It started as a weird feeling in my chest until it became an even stranger feeling inside my head. Questions about how my body looked, questioning who I would be as a son. And it continued, it raced through my mind for two years until I decided to come out. The response was even rougher than the conflict I´d been facing and all I received were laughs and coos at my attempt at something new. Something bigger than me. And like a calm river, I flowed quietly. I took it back, rejected the idea I could be something more than what I was. I kept my head down, I kept my hope for progress to myself and I became a bad person. I became a person I would not even recognize in the mirror. I was evil, selfish, and disgusting to those who loved me and whom I loved. Those who didn't deserve my river rushing out and drenching them in dread. I was not a good person and it takes a lot out of me to admit that. I couldn't tell anyone about what I was battling because of how taboo the conversation about gender identity was, and I unleashed all my hate and rage onto others. I threw them around and played with them until they came back because they enjoyed the rush of me when I was myself. When I was kind, but loud. When I was quiet and thoughtful. When I was me. 

 I decided on the name Reo when I was 15. Reo in Spanish means river and Reo in Japanese can mean cherry blossoms, lotus flowers, paradise, and decree. Reo can be anywhere and everywhere. Anything and everything. All at one time. This name represents me at my very core. I surge but I ebb and I flow. 

 I need Bill A5918 passed. A bill permitting graduating students of public and nonpublic schools and institutions to have their chosen name on their diploma without a legal name or gender change. I am graduating high school this year as Reo. I am not the person I was before. Reo is the one who worked, who struggled, and who fought. I did this. I fight. I will finish the war. The war I have against myself, the war between the world and transgender individuals, the war that is trying to silence me. For those who are scared to speak like I was, I will speak for you. I will shout for you. I will scream for you. I never want anyone to experience what I did or become what I became. I am sick and I am tired of having to work for my rights. I am sick and tired of writing. I have so many scars from this battle I can´t remember who or what they each came from. I am tired. I´m exhausted. But I want 2023 to be the start of the end of the war on gender. I want every single person in the world to look at gender and be fascinated by how varying and beautiful it is. How it surges and stills like a river. How it can bring people together. I am not the only person who deserves this change. I will not rest until it is fulfilled. 

If anyone who sees this is interested in helping, spreading the word, or just has questions, my Instagram handle is @queuep1d and my messages are open for everyone if you agree or disagree with this proposal. 

 - R.C.