Cease and Desist: Ferrari Luce – An Ironic Petition to Protect Ferrari from Itself
The Issue
To: Ferrari S.p.A.,
Attn: Legal Department (and the ghost of Enzo Ferrari)
For years, Ferrari has bravely protected its brand identity by sending cease and desist letters to owners who dare to modify their own cars — from custom wheels to controversial wraps. We salute this noble crusade against personal expression.
However, we have recently become aware of a new threat so grave, so visually offensive, that it makes a Liberty Walk kit look like factory engineering.
We are talking, of course, about the Ferrari Luce.
The Ferrari Luce is not just bad — it is a crime against the Prancing Horse. This all-electric abomination:
Looks exactly like a wireless Microsoft mouse from 2004. Slippery, bloated, and utterly devoid of drama.
Features tail lights that make no sense.
Has zero aero. No vents. No wings. No scoops. No soul. It was designed in a wind tunnel where the fan was turned off.
Should not be electric. Nobody asked for this. Silence is not Ferrari. Give us noise, give us anger, give us anything but this apologetic jellybean.
In short: the Ferrari Luce is terrible all around. It is an insult to Italian design, to Enzo’s ghost, and to anyone with working eyes.
Therefore, we, the undersigned, hereby demand that Ferrari S.p.A.:
Issue a formal cease and desist letter — addressed to itself — ordering the immediate cessation of any and all work on the Ferrari Luce.\
Permanently scrap the Luce name and bury it next to the Ferrari SUV apology letter.
Publicly promise that no future Ferrari model will ever resemble a computer peripheral, lack aerodynamics, or whisper quietly into the night like a shameful secret.
Redirect its legal department to focus on this internal threat, rather than harassing enthusiasts who just wanted a satin pink wrap on their 458.
Ferrari: if you can send a lawyer after a YouTuber for putting a giant wing on a 20-year-old Mondial, you can certainly send a strongly worded letter to your own design team.
Do the right thing. Cease. Desist. And maybe — just maybe — let people enjoy their cars.
Name (real or plausibly Italian): ___________
Ferrari model you would modify out of spite: ___________
Number of cease & desist letters you've personally received from Ferrari: [ ] 0 [ ] 1 [ ] 3+ (lawyer on speed dial)
This petition is entirely satirical. No Ferraris were harmed in its writing. However, if Ferrari's legal team wishes to send us a cease and desist for parodying their legal department's enthusiasm, please include a photo of a smiling Enzo and we will frame it.
2
The Issue
To: Ferrari S.p.A.,
Attn: Legal Department (and the ghost of Enzo Ferrari)
For years, Ferrari has bravely protected its brand identity by sending cease and desist letters to owners who dare to modify their own cars — from custom wheels to controversial wraps. We salute this noble crusade against personal expression.
However, we have recently become aware of a new threat so grave, so visually offensive, that it makes a Liberty Walk kit look like factory engineering.
We are talking, of course, about the Ferrari Luce.
The Ferrari Luce is not just bad — it is a crime against the Prancing Horse. This all-electric abomination:
Looks exactly like a wireless Microsoft mouse from 2004. Slippery, bloated, and utterly devoid of drama.
Features tail lights that make no sense.
Has zero aero. No vents. No wings. No scoops. No soul. It was designed in a wind tunnel where the fan was turned off.
Should not be electric. Nobody asked for this. Silence is not Ferrari. Give us noise, give us anger, give us anything but this apologetic jellybean.
In short: the Ferrari Luce is terrible all around. It is an insult to Italian design, to Enzo’s ghost, and to anyone with working eyes.
Therefore, we, the undersigned, hereby demand that Ferrari S.p.A.:
Issue a formal cease and desist letter — addressed to itself — ordering the immediate cessation of any and all work on the Ferrari Luce.\
Permanently scrap the Luce name and bury it next to the Ferrari SUV apology letter.
Publicly promise that no future Ferrari model will ever resemble a computer peripheral, lack aerodynamics, or whisper quietly into the night like a shameful secret.
Redirect its legal department to focus on this internal threat, rather than harassing enthusiasts who just wanted a satin pink wrap on their 458.
Ferrari: if you can send a lawyer after a YouTuber for putting a giant wing on a 20-year-old Mondial, you can certainly send a strongly worded letter to your own design team.
Do the right thing. Cease. Desist. And maybe — just maybe — let people enjoy their cars.
Name (real or plausibly Italian): ___________
Ferrari model you would modify out of spite: ___________
Number of cease & desist letters you've personally received from Ferrari: [ ] 0 [ ] 1 [ ] 3+ (lawyer on speed dial)
This petition is entirely satirical. No Ferraris were harmed in its writing. However, if Ferrari's legal team wishes to send us a cease and desist for parodying their legal department's enthusiasm, please include a photo of a smiling Enzo and we will frame it.
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Petition created on May 27, 2026