Our prisons are overcrowded and a drain on public resource. Yet time and time again, people are put in for small amounts of time based on an accumulation of fairly small misdemeanours.

Let's stop wasting public money by filling our prisons which are bursting at the seams. Let's take these small time crooks and punish them properly. Punish them medieval style. They had the stocks back in the day. But nowadays we have much more brutal ways of making people stop their life of petty criminality. One episode of Mrs Browns Boys is enough for people to put down their bag of swag and their stripey jumper and face mask. Actually, keep the face mask at the minute but make sure it covers your nose.

A burglar would never again jemmy a window if he knew he had to watch Brendan O'Carroll dress up in drag and mug around that set looking for all the world like a man who never gotted hugged by his own mammy a day in his life otherwise why would he degrade himself in such a way. The humanity. God, the humanity. 

The people that watched this voted for Brexit. Of that I have no doubt. But criminals have a bit of common sense. One watch of this Clockwork Orange style with the eyes glued open and criminals will be down the job centre updating their CVs and lining up legitimate day jobs. People say television is chewing gum for the eyes. Well, this chewing gum is stale and from under the table and someone has wiped in bogies. No one wants to be subjected to Mrs Brown's Boys.  

Mrs Brown's Boys is everything that's wrong with the world. Let's use it instead to make things right. Let's fix the lower rungs of our judicial system. Let's make low rent criminals, your Danny Dyer wannabes, your football hooligans, your housebreakers, let's save the exchequer money and instead make them watch episode after episode of the worst sitcom of all time – Mrs Brown's boys.