Dishwasher Pond is a landmark in the pocket community of Tierrasanta in San Diego, California with issues that could be immediately remedied by the blessing of a Chick-fil-A. 

• Rampant non-local pollution of the otherwise charmingly filthy neighborhood cesspool would be minimized. Restoration of the traditional value of "if you ain't from T, please don't pee" could be policed by the notoriously orderly Chick-fil-A employees. Proper Tierrasanta identification would be required to dump whatever debris or sewage one fancies. Undocumented trespassers would not be permitted.
• Gentrifying the Dishwasher Chupacabra tf out. The flying, amphibious, nymphomaniac known as the "Dishwasher Chupacabra" plagued local fishermen, stoners, and trippers alike. The foul beast has preyed on the heavily intoxicated for much too long and employing the gentrifying prowess of Chick-fil-A (which some liken to the fast food equivalent of a Trader Joe's) would raise rent prices high enough to force the Chupacabra to more affordable housing options--perhaps a pond in closer proximity to Patrick Henry High School. 
• Combatting an uptick in gay-on-gay crime. Given Chick-fil-A's track record as a safe space for the antiquated definition of marriage, one would expect Tierrasanta gay crime syndicates to do business elsewhere and no longer would unaffiliated Tierrasanta young gay men and women be caught in the crossfire. In a world where most of us are all at least a little gay, in turn the majority of the community would rest easy knowing that they would no longer have to pick a side.
• Bolstering the local economy. These like, make money, right?