But not for kinship carers! Tomorrow we deal with full on melt downs from the children in our care because their parents haven't bothered to call or come and see them, or because they have seen them and filled their heads with the delusions they live. All the services that those lucky enough to be engaged in have closed, at one of the most stressful times of year possible, they shut! Suicide is considered by many as the pressure is real. The only thing preventing it is the knowledge that these children have suffered enough trauma in their short lives and we as kin refuse to contribute to it, so we soldier on. We are abused, verbally, physically and financially by the biological parents and their families, by our own families and by child protection. For those of us lucky enough to have a comfort zone without interference we grieve the loss of the way it should have been, we delight in the wonderment on the kiddies faces that even though they have been challenging all year, Santa has somehow managed to give them something, and we get angry when those that have caused this trauma, to us and the kids, portray the perfect family life to all that are ignorant of the facts. Here are some true stories of our real world stresses: * mum hasn't bothered to contact them in 6 weeks. She sent a text to her sister saying she has no money to buy presents. She was given $500 from the Trustee but she spent it on the new boyfriend. * power outages send our little one into a major panic as mum used to lock her in the cupboard for hours on end * Contact visits fitting in with all the other stuff my own primary age children do Phone calls - and the expectations from all sides to do the right things by them (that might not be the best for us or all) * Money food presents bio m other family members who think i should either give kids back or tell her where to go * Keeping my mouth shut when she is all puffed up and looking pretty and knowing quietly deep down inside that WE kinship carers ...are the true warriors...and we will give Xmas in spirit... * We have financial stress as we get all our bills just before Christmas, no one else buys the kids gifts except for us & of course you never know when the parents will decide to start abusing us or just randomly show up. * Promises of presents that probably wont receive. Trying to provide extra so the grandies are not so upset. Added stress this year eldest gc off to high school bio mum and bio aunt believe bio mum has the right to be at the farewell while pop (who has raised gc since the age of 4) should stay away. Bio mum had no interest in the high school orientation day still owes gc last years birthday and Xmas present. * Not having enough to buy gifts that they really would like ? How to pay for Xmas food ?? Listening to gs cry cause he wishes his family was a good one . � and wants his mum and dad * the isolation from my own peers They are catching up for Christmas get togethers - dinner or movies - maybe a drink I can’t go now I have g/s - 15 months - I love him to bits - but I do envy the idea of being able to sort my kids out (9 and up) and do some me things with people my own age .... but even if I got the chance I’m too tired anyway * Knowing that two special presents will be under our tree and they will never be opened . Our stressors on Xmas day will be knowing two precious little angels in heaven will be watching their brother open his presents . * December Court hearing and the fall out from any decisions made. The requirement to drop off and pick up grandie on Christmas day so that they can spend time with their bio parent. Makes it difficult to celebrate with the rest of the family when you are providing a taxi service for the bio parent as they don't drive and public transport is almost non existent on Christmas day. People who make these decisions have no idea of the impact to the other people in the family group. It isn't all about the bio parent. * •Broken promises. •Bracing myself to pick up the pieces & comfort my grandchilds hurting heart, when bio either breaks promises or misbehaves on visitation. •lessened respite as solo Kin Carer, on school holidays. •grieving/missing our adult child, being sad about their lack of self care & self responsibility, due to their bad choices & anger issues. They lack maturity to put their children’s needs first. * I don't have problems since my daughter doesn't give a shit about him. But bio's being given Xmas day or grandparents not allowed to take kids on holidays over Christmas because the bio's have "rights" needs to stop. We have the kids for a reason, we are the ones that have given up everything for our babies so why should parents be able to sweep in on the special days & ruin it.....if they want Christmas, birthdays (in my daughters case she did...when he was 2...want to see him for HER birthday when she couldn't be bothered even sending Xmas or birthday presents for any of his except his 1st birthday where she put on a great act of being loving mum), mothers/fathers day......then get their bloody act together & step up for these kids & put them 1st no matter what it takes. * Court asking me to hand a five year old girl over for overnight visits with a man she barely knows. Someone who is in his forties and has never been able to hold down an adult relationship. 5 overnights so far and now a very anxious child. Six more until Final Orders end. She is trying so hard to deal with it. Heartbreaking. And so it goes on. Please sign our petition and our E Petition to parliament, we need recognition and change, we are NOT the problem, we ARE working towards a solution. Thank you for your understanding and support, it means so much to so many xx