This is an open letter written by someone who lives in America. I became friends with him due to common kinship ground. He gave permission to share to this site. I thought many could relate. You are the most selfish person I know. You have 6 children. You gave birth to them. You decided to have them. Six. Do you ever think about what their life has become? You spend less than 2 hrs a week with them. When you do see them, it's at your convenience, and it has to be under supervision. Court ordered. Imagine that. Do you have the ability to love? I wonder. Where is your heart? It's certainly not here with these children. This situation doesn't seem to bother you at all. If it did, you would spend every possible minute with them. You would pour into their lives. Why don't you? When you were begged by William, just before Rick was released from jail, not to take him back. Your response to your son was " sorry I fucked up your life". With tears in his eyes he begged you not to do this again. His pleading fell on deaf ears. Nothing he or anyone else could say would change your mind. I can't wrap my mind around any of this. It makes no sense to me at all. Have you become so accustomed to this lifestyle that you’ve forgotten that you are, in fact responsible for them? What do you contribute to their support? Oh, you will buy something occasionally, maybe even help with camp money and that by your noble gesture of offering to pay half. How completely thoughtful of you! What memories are you making with them? What will they be able to laugh about at some future gathering and say, ”do you remember the time that”..... It won’t be your name that’s used. Do you view us as the enemy? Are we your justification for all this because we “ took” your kids? Who does that? I mean, who sets out to take someone’s kids? Who raises six children at a time in life when most look forward to retirement? No, it was never even a question. These children deserve a life. They deserve to have a childhood that is as normal as possible. Perhaps not the idyllic childhood you had, but something good. They need to know that nothing is more important then they are. Your actions speak volumes. Perhaps you feel this is our fault for not accepting Rick. I accepted the other two and in time, time that I asked for, we would have even accepted him too. I tired to help him. I gave him a job, tried to help him kick drugs, treated him good. Truth is it’s never been a question of acceptance on our part. This dysfunctional drug induced life you share with him is what the two of you have made it. It’s a revolving door that always leads back to the same place, only to repeat itself over and over. Meanwhile the children grow and get older. Time, precious time is forever lost and what do you have to show for it? They have been here for 6 years. 6 years. That’s a long time for anyone. It’s nearly a lifetime for them. I really feel bad for them that they will grow up essentially without you, knowing they played 2nd fiddle to your drug addicted pet human. All of them except William and Oliver were abandoned by their fathers. You are the common bond they share and sadly, even that was denied them. A relationship is not simply making an appearance. It’s sharing hopes, making memories, and taking time for them even if it is inconvenient. I don’t tell you these things to hurt you. I really have no desire to hurt you at all. It’s just that this whole situation is so incomprehensible to me that I had to somehow try and sort out my own feelings. I’m hurt, exhausted, and somewhat bitter. If I were honest about it I suppose I take it personal. I shouldn’t be surprised that you give no thought at all as to how physically and financially draining this is for us or care about anything we feel at all. After all, you haven’t just thrown your kids under a bus, you’ve thrown us all under. Your choice was clear. Time after time you’ve been given the opportunity to choose your children. You chose, and all of us lost. The children lost a mom and we lost a daughter that we adored. That’s what hurts the most. You were our world. It’s up to us now to carry on and give them a life. I pray that God lets me live long enough to do this. Just remember, time waits for no one. When you come to the end of your life, what will you have to show for it? Who will you share your last days with? Regrets are debts that you will never live long enough to pay.