Hello everyone,
I wanted to share an important update because so many of you have been following Mum’s story and helping us in so many different ways. Your kindness has meant more to both of us than I could ever say.
I cannot thank you enough, not only for signing the petition, but also for donating to Mum’s GoFundMe, and for sending cards, little gifts, and messages of love and support. It has not gone unnoticed. Every single act of kindness has made a difference and helped us feel less alone. I am so grateful for all of you.
Sadly, I have to tell you that Mum’s case has now been through both stages of the complaints process with the housing association. They have made their final decision, and there is nothing else we can do to change it. Mum will not be allowed to stay in her current home.
They have offered her a discretionary tenancy, but only if she moves to a smaller two-bedroom property. Because Mum’s tenancy was already passed on once before, she has no legal right to stay where she is.
Months ago, a housing officer told me they might let Mum stay if we could provide medical evidence. We worked so hard to get that, but in the end, it does not seem to have been taken into account at all. I wish they had not said that because it gave us hope that sadly was not real.
I have also tried asking for help from our local MP, Seema Malhotra. She is fully aware of Mum’s case, but has shown no interest in helping. I had one phone call from someone in her office over a month ago who said they would look into it, but I have heard nothing since. I have no confidence she will do anything now, and it feels as though there is simply no humanity in the system.
Mum’s health has become much worse. Her mental health is suffering terribly. She cries often and is so frightened about her finances and the future. She asks me if I can help her with money, and it breaks my heart that I simply cannot. I wish I could. But the truth is, I am in debt myself, despite working as hard as I possibly can.
I am running my own small business, trying to keep two households going, caring for my autistic son, and supporting Mum. My business has not been doing well recently, and although I am giving it everything I have, I am just about scraping by.
A couple of weeks ago, I helped Mum with some money, and because of that, I was unable to pay my own rent. Thankfully, I was able to come to an arrangement with my rent manager to pay it off weekly, but I cannot keep doing this. I simply do not have the money anymore.
Mum is still waiting, after fourteen months, for an appointment at the memory clinic to get a diagnosis for dementia. Without that diagnosis, we have been left in limbo and unable to get her the help she needs. She has high blood pressure, severe memory loss, tremors in her head and hands, and she has lost so much weight that she now looks skeletal. She is frail, anxious, and becoming more unwell every day.
We still do not know where Mum will be moved. I am praying it will be somewhere nearby because I honestly do not know how I will manage to look after her if she is moved far away. It is incredibly worrying and exhausting.
Although we were able to raise over £1,800 through the GoFundMe, every penny of that has already gone towards Mum’s bills. There is nothing left of it now, but the bills keep coming, and we simply do not have the money to pay them.
It is not easy for me to ask for help again. It feels awful, and it goes against everything in me because I am someone who works hard and hates feeling like I am begging. But we have been given no choice. Even the smallest donation helps so much and means more to us than I can say.
We are waiting for a miracle, which has not happened yet, but you never know. I can still hope. One thing I have not lost through all of this, even though it might sound crazy to some, is my belief in the goodness of people. The organisations and systems may have let Mum down, but there are real people who genuinely care. And those people are the ones I love and care about in return.
Here is the GoFundMe link:
Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for all the love, kindness, and support you have shown us. It has truly kept us going. I will keep you updated as soon as I know where Mum is going to be moved.
With love and gratitude,
Lisa.