We, the undersigned, are tired of waking up, craving a delicious Big Mac at 9 a.m., only to be met with a dry biscuit, rubbery egg, and the crushing realization that it’s still “breakfast hours.”

 

Your breakfast menu has had a good run — decades, even — but it’s time to face the truth:

 

The hash browns are soggy sadness disks.
The eggs taste like they were assembled in a lab.
The sausage McMuffin? A cry for help in sandwich form.

 

 

Meanwhile, your burgers — the true heart and soul of McDonald’s — sit idle behind the grill, waiting for the clock to strike 10:30 like it’s some kind of greasy Cinderella story.

 

We demand burger equality at all hours.

If I want a Quarter Pounder at dawn, I should have that right.

If someone else wants pancakes at 3 p.m., great — let’s coexist peacefully under one golden-arched menu.

 

So please, McDonald’s:

End breakfast tyranny.

Stop limiting our taste buds by time zone.

Let burgers be free.

 

Sincerely,

Everyone who has ever been denied a burger before 10:30 a.m.