CHANGE STEP-PARENT ADOPTION CRITERIA

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STEP-PARENT ADOPTION.

The General Assembly for the state of Virginia meets in January. The goal is to present this petition to them this January.

It's can be a beautiful thing when a step-parent steps up and becomes a parent to a child in need.  BUT, as with foster parents, step-parents should ALSO be screened when adopting a child.

ALL step parents who wish to adopt, should meet at least the same requirements as that of a foster parent.  Background checks should be conducted.  Home studies should be conducted.  The step parent should complete parenting classes which speak directly to the issues surrounding step parenting and adoption.

Although my daughter was not my biological child, I raised her as my own, with my name, and without the presence of her biological father.  After her mother and I separated, I maintained 50% custody of my daughter, for 5 years before she was finally alienated away from me.  When it came time for the psychopathic lying spouse of my daughter's mother to adopt her, I was not even informed.  The only signature needed was that of a man who hadn't seen her since she was a baby.  And when her obituary was written, I was not mentioned by the lying spiteful controlling mother.  She was too worried trying to save face and keep the public from knowing what the man she let into our daughter's life had done.

There is an alarming rate of child homicide and abuse at the hands of the live-in partner of the mother.

50% of children murdered, are killed by the mother and/or her partner (non-father). {*52% calculated by adding "Mother (28%)", "Mother & Non-Parent (11%)", "Mother & Father" (10% - since step-fathers are often erroneously reported as "Father"), and Mother's Male Partner (3%)}

"Preschoolers living with one natural and one stepparent were 40 TIMES MORE LIKELY to become CHILD ABUSE cases..."

"Children residing in households with unrelated adults were nearly 50 TIMES AS LIKELY TO DIE OF INFLICTED INJURIES than children residing with 2 biological parents"

Currently, in the state of Virginia, Circuit Court judges use their "discretion" when deciding if a step-parent needs a background check or a home study.  The fact is that judges ARE NOT trained in family dynamics and they need LAW to direct them.

 

This proposal does not necessarily prohibit a person with a criminal history from adopting, but it will invite deeper investigation, including surmising the family dynamics, interviewing victims or alleged victims, informing other family members of the adoption proceedings.

Some reasons this legislation is necessary:

  • A parent often alienates and/or completely shuts out the other parent, and may then encourage their spouse to adopt the child underhandedly.  There are signs that professionals can spot.
  • A 'step-father' can be a 'sleeper', who is actually grooming a step-child, manipulating people to believe his intentions are honorable - when they are NOT.  Often, there is some concerned family that can be contacted to enlighten investigators.
  • Children can be mentally and emotionally abused to the point of rejecting their loving and protective parent, and desiring another person to adopt them.  There are signs that professionals can spot.
  • Documents can be forged, making the adoption process illegitimate.
  • Serious deviant history can be an indicator of a deviant future. 

When a step parent is sincere in their love and care for the step child they wish to adopt, and there are no legitimate contesting parties, but some red flags are still present, then counseling and classes for the potential adopting step-parent, can help the investigators determine the future safety and well-being of the children. 

Various other factors need discussed.  For example:

  •  the length of time the step parent has known the child
  • the child's preference
  • the child's possible underlying emotional or mental health issues {which often arise under duress of alienation}
  • other parents or guardians who have raised the child.  Often they have been alienated from the child against their will, despite the closeness they have with the child and an extensive amount of time and effort raising them.

REMEMBER - The 'evil one' - Satan - prowls around, seeking ones to devour. (1 Peter 5:8)

This is a spiritual battle, but we are called to defend the poor and the fatherless here in the physical realm too (Psalms 82:3, Isaiah 1:17, James 1:27, Jeremiah 5:28, Zechariah 7:10, Malachi 3:5).

 

 

 



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