The popular colloquialism “hot as balls” is frequently used to describe temperature conditions considered to be unpleasantly hot. Since this relies on subjective feelings, and could refer to a wide range of specific temperatures, it leaves a great deal of room for confusion. By officially defining “hot as balls” as to a specific temperature or defined temperature range, we can then form a frame of reference which improves communication and is also hilarious, thereby improving society in two ways at once. 

Since human testicles generally stay around 97°F (36.1°C), we suggest making this as a starting point for the official “hot as balls” temperature. This may be further discussed by a committee of experts prior to official adoption.