Family violence services- ‘this is family violence’
Police- ‘this is not family violence’
Health Professionals- you have to set boundaries, have you considered legal action?
Start viewing me as the perpetrator, disengage.
Mediation- would I put myself through mediating with a person who lies and manipulates? No. Refuse to engage.
Legal services- money, waitlists, additional work on top of carer role? No thanks
Magistrates court- IVO granted, ‘we’ve suggested he complete a men’s behavioural change program’. ‘Did he agree?’, ‘We can’t share that information’
After one year- legal aid suggests IVO is dropped. I give up.
Education systems- don’t have education on coercive control, start viewing me as the perpetrator. Disengage.
Child Support- ‘you have to provide evidence, he has a different story’ (even though he’s lied before - automated message at start of call says lying is unlawful but nil consequences for this behaviour).
Re-traumatised through having to screen shot and send months of SMS messages where mine and child’s situation has been minimised.
I ask you this as a fellow human being- wouldn’t you be distressed, traumatised, untrustworthy?
This is happening to men, women, the elderly, children, families and vulnerable groups.
I remember the campaign for Dolly, the young teenager who was bullied and sadly ended her life- ‘Speak even when your voice shakes’. My voice is literally breaking. I’m so tired of over explaining, trying to convince people of my truth, my whole being has been primed for fight and flight since I met this perpetrator.
Please continue to spread the word to give others a voice, remind them that they count x