[In reference to the snack, if you are looking for what a cookie is in reference to computing, there is already a relatively decent definition]

The turn of the century has signified the world having to comprehend with many crises and circumstances unthinkable to the average human being, yet nothing has lead to more confusion and complete disarray than the debate surrounding the definition of a cookie. A seven year old boy I was when I first tried a soft, rich Tesco bakery cookie; the doughy texture was a notable factor for my instant adoration of these delightful snacks. However, shortly after I had unearthed this popular phenomena, I was introduced to the deceiving and, what I would later percieve as, impure Maryland cookie. The hard, gritty texture reminded me of another marketable treat, widely known as a 'biscuit'. I was left confused, bewilded and betrayed; how could a global, respected corporation be getting away with this level of farcical advertisement? Is this cookie I had in my hand really just a biscuit?

As a now 19 year old chap, I have managed to find a potential answer. A Twitter poll, conducted by myself asking whether a hard cookie was indeed a biscuit, reaffirmed rather than concluded my fears: nobody knows what a cookie is. Unfortunately, the sheer variety of defintions coming directly from the dictionary oligarchs do little to help this situation. To name a few examples, a simple Google search defines it as 'a sweet biscuit', Merriam-Webster state it as 'a small flat or slightly raised cake', whilst Wikipedia have it as 'a small, baked good'. Why do these companies not have a united definition? What defines a cookie? The texture? The shape? The SIZE?

This, if anything, gives the people a clear mandate to demand a fully established, conclusive definition of what a cookie is, where this debate can be settled. The further disregard of the significance of this petition only ignites the growing discontent on this issue. If this petition is successful, even against my perspective of what a cookie is, we can safely put this matter to bed, and focus on bigger ordeals such as climate change. Please sign this today, where we seek justice for cookies.