24/08/21 - I went to the doctors after finding a large lunp in my breast. I went to the doctors and was told I'll be referred to the breast clinic but it'll probably take 3 weeks because I'm under 30. I actually felt like I'd wasted their time and felt like a fraud for being there. I feel so lucky now to have the referral put in for me.
27/09/21 - 3 DAYS AFTER GOING TO THE DOCTORS I was seen at the breast clinic. I had an initial consultation with a Consultant and Health Care Assistant. I was then sent for an Ultrasound and Biopsies. I could feel my heart racing as I could see sense that something wasn't right. This is the first moment I thought that it might actually be a Cancerous lump. I had nobody with me. I was then sent back to a different waiting room, to be seen by another Consultant. The alarm bells were ringing. The other Consultant who came to see me, was accompanied by a Breast Care nurse. I knew something was wrong. I was told my Ultrasound looks abnormal, and it looks like the lump in my breast is measuring at 3.5cm. I was then sent for an instant Mammogram. I was also told I have a 4/5 chance of this being Cancer, but they couldn't officially confirm this to me until the results of the biopsy was back... I knew they knew, I could see it in their eyes. I left the hospital that day uncontrollably crying. I have NEVER cried like this before. I felt like a vulnerable child crying for their parents... which I I kind of was really.
07/09/21 - The dreaded diagnosis day (4 days before my 27th birthday). My world was suddenly flipped upside down. I prepared myself to be told it was Cancerous, and thought I was prepared to hear it. I was given the news that it was infact Cancer... Turns out I was NOT prepared to hear that as subconsciously I guess I may have tried to convince myself it couldn't possibly be Cancer. Happy birthday to me!! My surgeon then performed a physical examination, and was concerned as he could feel enlarged lymph nodes under my armpit. I was convinced I had caught it too late.
Everything then happened so quickly. I had a lymph node biopsy, MRI scan and CT scan all within a week of diagnosis (Thank you NHS!). The results of these were that they all came back clear! My mastectomy date was then set.
01/10/21 - I was due to have a right sided mastectomy with sentinel lymph node BIOPSY, where radioactive dye was inserted into my body to help guide the surgeon if there's any Cancer within the area, and where around 4 lymph nodes were meant to be removed, to be further tested for Cancer. I had to wait 2 weeks for these results. I was told I ended up having a mastectomy with sentinel lymph node DISSECTION, where 19 lymph nodes instead of 4 were all removed, as they were all enlarged, alongside my cancerous lump which was infact 5.1cm, not 3.5cm as originally thought. To make matters worse, the Cancer had started spreading into my milk ducts and into 1 lymph node, with some pre cancerous cells having spread further into some other lymph nodes.
For 2 weeks I had a chest drain in which bloody hurt! Then I suffered with cording (a common 'complication' following a mastectomy), until I snapped it whilst cleaning my house as soon as that drain was out! I still to this day have very little sensation/a lot of numbness of the right side of my chest, and upper right arm following the surgery.
08/11/21 - I had surgery following 2 intense weeks of fertility treatment. 13 of my eggs were harvested incase my treatment causes me to become infinitely infertile and unable to ever conceive naturally.
11/11/21 - I started Chemotherapy, to be administered over 6 cycles, with 1 cycle every 3 weeks. 3 x cycles of EC... I lost my hair, developed multiple/painful mouth ulcers, suffered with nausea and fatigue. 3 x rounds of Docetaxel... Neuropathy in my legs and feet and chemo fog. I now have 2 rounds of Chemotherapy left before the next stage... Radiotherapy! I will then be put onto hormone medications which will induce the menopause, to block my body from producing Oestrogen. This is because my Cancer is Oestrogen positive, ultimately feeding off the Oestrogen my body produces.
DID YOU KNOW?
There are multiple different types of breast cancer.
Progesterone positive.
Oestrogen positive.
HER2 positive.
Triple negative.
15/12/21 - I saw a genetic specialist to discuss genetic testing, to find out if my Cancer is caused by any genes that may have been passed through my family to me, or whether I'm just totally unlucky and my Cancer has developed without any genes. It turns out I DON'T carry a Cancerous gene, I'm just totally unlucky (story of my life).
11/02/22 - I had an episode of what I think/hope was 'Chemo fog', where I lost all sense of time, became confused, slurring my words, struggling to think of words I needed to use and had reduced sensation in my feet, most probably more linked to the neuropathy I have been experiencing, caused by my Chemotherapy. I got a scan of my head and was told the worst and most sickening news I've had throughout my Cancer journey - it looks like there's metastases on my skull... meaning it looks like the Cancer has spread and has become incurable...
I have since had news from my Oncology team they don't believe that this is the case.
This is now something that is always at the back of my mind and I'm struggling to shift. Hopefully in time this may ease. Cancer is just absolutely horrendous !! I had only just sorted my Will out 2 weeks prior. I left the hospital that day gutted that my new lease of life was soon going to be torn apart because of Cancer, and I had to start thinking about what I need to do and sort out before I die.
03/03/22 - MY FINAL CHEMO! I DID IT! A month break now before I start my Radiotherapy and hormonal treatments. I found out my Breast Cancer Tumour was T3, G3, N1, ER 6/8. This is how scarily close I was to this becoming a stage 4 Metastatic Cancer. At 27 years old this is a horrendous thought. I'm so glad that I went to the doctors when I did... Imagine if it was left another month or so!
19/04/22 - MY FINAL RADIOTHERAPY! COMPLETE! This was the easiest part of my treatment and it was great to finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. I may not have 100% guarantee that my Cancer has gone completely, so I'll never fully escape that tunnel, but I'm as near as possible to the end of it! Today marks a second chance of life and I'm going to fucking appreciate it. My finger nails are starting to come off, my toe nails already have, I'm still suffering with chemo fog, I'm exhausted all the time, I'm still waiting to have a decent amount of hair on my head again, suffering with hot and cold flushes from the Tamoxifen, no longer have periods (bitter sweet as I really appreciate not having them but it's a reminder that I'm infertile), and I still dread every single hospital letter that comes through the post, but I'm here! AANDDDD I'm in a much better position than I was 7 and a half months ago when I was diagnosed.
06/05/22 - A horrible reminder about how real Cancer is. I've been managing quite well mentally - as much as possible I suppose. I thought I was doing well. But last night, a colleague/friend died from this horrible disease. Absolutley horrible. She was an absolute advocate of how to manage Breast Cancer, especially secondary. She still managed to make everyone laugh and smile until she couldn't any more. Keep drinking those pints up there gorgeous girl. We will have a pint together again one day, sleep peacefully, no more pain.
I may have lost my breast, be artificially sent to go through the menopause at 27 years old, have become infertile whether this be temporary or permenant I don't know, be at risk of lymphoedema for life, have some reduced sensation, put on a shit ton of weight and have to make some lifestyle changes, but it's (hopefully) going to save my life. Hopefully I'll still be able to look back at this journey in 5, 10, 20, even 40 years time! I am so grateful for the Cancer in a funny kind of way, as I feel it's given me a new lease of life and to appreciate every opportunity in life rather than let them go.
Before my diagnosis, Cancer was just a word. Now it's what I think about every day, the first thing when I wake up, and the last thing I think about when going to sleep. HOWEVER - It did me a bloody good favour... It helped me discover myself, and learn to love myself instead of hating myself. It made me learn how to enjoy my own company instead of dread it.
The Cancer also helped me to start appreciating life... I am now so grateful to wake up every day and I have met someone who makes the shit I've been through, a completely worthy experience. I'm mentally in the best place I've been for a long long time, weirdly enough, and I'm so happy instead of being so miserable, withdrawn and weighed down by a narcissist. ONWARDS AND UPWARDS �
My girls Lois Adele, Sammi Miller, Rachel Barrigan and Claire Gibson are doing the Great North Run �♀️ on 11/09/2022 - (which coincidentally is my 28th birthday �) - in aid of the Breast Cancer Now charity
I've been very open on my Facebook page about my Cancer journey and I want to raise awareness for EVERYONE and ANYONE to check their breasts (AND BODIES) regularly, MEN INCLUDED. Tell your families, friends, neighbours, colleagues, strangers in the street, spread the word!! If any of you have any concerns about your body, please don't hesitate to contact me and/or your GP surgery ASAP and DO NOT LET THEM FOB YOU OFF!!