Do we respect ladies well in our society? Perhaps no, we don't.
Do we respect ladies well in our society? Perhaps no, we don't.
The Issue
Knowledge Bits and Steps to Reduce the Probability of Body Exposure of Women at Home and Elsewhere
Women have for long been respected in our country. They have even been compared to demigods and deities. But, in modern time, every day we read or hear about molestation, sexual harassment and even rape. Souls of noble people tremble in anguish and sadness. I have been thinking on this problem for a few years. Over the years, I have come across surprising and alarming facts. Two of them are:
a. We teach our girls to be too open in regard with privacy, and
b. men and women are both indulged in crimes of abduction and rape.
The Process of Learning
An idea or practice, if taught during early days of childhood, are instilled better and deeper in the mind of a person. This capacity of learning and teaching can very well be used to teach bad things as well as good things. The reason behind this philosophy is that young children do not question much and imbibe teachings quickly. To teach and learn is one of two parts; the second part being: The ideas and beliefs so implanted in young brains and minds are almost impossible to shatter or replace. So, the whole story is: a. Learning, and b. Retaining. This second part makes the learning even riskier.
Where We Discriminate Girls and Boys
When a boy transitions from childhood to adolescence, he begins to keep his body covered and hidden from all relations including mother, father, brother and sister. But, when a girl undergoes the transition, she is taught to keep her body covered only in front of half the relations and half the people. She is well taught to keep her modesty covered when in front of brother or father, but she is encouraged to be naked in front of mother and sister... and even ladies in neighbourhood. This is where seeds of discrimination are sown. The logical point is: Women have eyes as well as men have, so they too can see very well what comes in front of their eyes. Then, why is girl not taught to shy in front of ladies?
Where the Problem Lies
a. When girl is married to a man, ideal thinking which comes to mind is that: By now she has been hiding her body from eyes and hands of all, but now she has got a partner whom she may trust fully and she may disrobe in front of as they would spend good time together and make love in its pious and righteous form in addition to managing family, home, finances and health together. But the real situation is entirely different. It's not the case that only one new person assumes unobstructed access to her body and trust; rather half his family, half his relatives and even half his neighbourhood assumes open access to her modesty.
b. Even a doctor accesses private parts of a person only when it is needed. Otherwise patients don't wander naked around doctors. Doctors don't even say to a patient, "Why are you shying to change (clothes) in front of me when I have seen your whole body in past?" But most of women say such things to resisting women and assume continued and repeated access to their privacy.
c. Many young girls and women now a days misuse this undue privilege of access to other ladies' privacy in following manners:
(i.) Too open ladies force shy ladies into this dark world of big openness and the latter have to give in, because it is an assumed rule of society.
(ii.) Mischievous ladies make very shameful and wrongful use of this freedom to appease their sexual desires by helping one another. To the other people, they are 'sisters' or 'just friends'.
(iii.) Few customs are also not questioned or abandoned which require a lady to give in and accept sight and touch by another woman on the former's body. When somebody questions moral aspect of such a practice, she/he is told: "A woman only is going to touch her body, what's the problem in that?" The people think: To expose to a woman means not to expose at all.
(iv.) Criminal women exploit this blind faith of unsuspecting women and plot for their abduction and rape. It is also well known how common it is that women victimise and reach girls to brothels.
When a woman has exposed to over 50 women and now she exposes to a man, she says, "Today for the first time I exposed to somebody." Isn't it a false statement? Isn't it a shameful joke?
Food for Thought
You sit back for a minute or two and think yourself: Should a marriage really mean this to a girl? Should all girls be bound to be too open to the ladies in their in-laws and neighbourhood? Cannot she have right to defend her modesty and dignity from these women and girls? An unlimited and countless number of ladies pass by her when a lady is bathing or they keep standing by her when she is changing. They don't step back when they unknowingly enter such a room at such a time; only men are supposed to try to avoid every possible glance at her naked body. Why so? Why dare women in in-laws' family assume that the bride won't be shy of ladies in their family? Why do they assume as open access to see or touch her body as her husband alone should have?
News of rapes by men are so much in number and they are spread so widely. Please tell the last time when you read a news where a woman was sexually harassed or raped by another woman. Such news are not so prevalent because the women with romantic intentions are getting their purposes fulfilled in following ways:
a. When one woman has wrongful intentions and the other one is unaware, the latter's body is viewed or touched under false belief that the latter should not worry for the former is a lady. NO FIGHT OR STRUGGLE NEEDED
b. When both the ladies have mischievous intentions, they both proceed further with mutual consent. NO FIGHT OR STRUGGLE NEEDED
c. When a shy and truly moral girl is victimised, she has to keep quiet because nobody at home is going to support her plea. Men and women say in unison: "Don't be shy of women, it's common to be open among women. Go learn it!"
d. Society boasts of being conservative and having homophobia, but it has left doors wide open to homosexuals to go and play and nobody asks the participants what they were doing behind the doors. If society wants to keep conservative and promote only heterosexuality, avenues for homosexual contacts should be monitored and checked. Else the society should cognise and respect the fact that homosexuality is no fairy dream rather it's for real and make provisions for people to declare their homosexual or bisexual relationships and live happily.
Proposed Solution
1. First Step
Women and girls should start to defend their dignity and tell everybody: "Only my spouse and I have right to see or touch my intimate body parts. Others please excuse us. I'm not married to you, you have no right to come any time and see my body in vulnerable condition or touch my body in any such manner."
2. Second Step
Teach our little girls and boys alike: Now you're entering adolescence. Now you should not wander naked in houses or on roads. Now it's your duty as well as right to keep your modesty covered. Now onwards, only two classes of people may have right to see or touch your private body parts:-
a. you yourself and your spouse(s)
b. doctor
By 'doctor' here is meant any person who offers medical assistance or tries to save life. It includes doctors, nurses, army persons, soldiers, disaster relief front workers, good Samaritans and any other person who in good spirit comes forth to help and save you in regard with your health and life.
3. Third Step
Bring up and educate all the children together. When we seat boys in separate classrooms and schools and girls in other classrooms and schools, they do not get chances to meet together, chat, mingle and respect the fact the person opposite is no object to exploit or no heavenly surprise but in fact we are all same species Homo sapiens, we are all alike. When we let children study and play together, they learn to respect each other as persons, as humans and they abide by true spirit of friendship and do not think of cheating or harassing one another.
Conclusion
We need to educate our people on moral topics and make them aware of relevant issues. It's not about offering a special or more privileged position to ladies or gentlemen, but it's about setting an all-inclusive and harmonious behavioural system up in society. If a boy is taught to save his modesty from all members of family, society and world, then girls also deserve an equivalent treatment and respect regarding dignity. Neighbours or criminals should not be allowed to see girls in compromised situation because the viewers are ladies.
Step [1.] under "Proposed Solution" is applicable for grown-up ladies including those who had been taught discriminatory things in formative years. Step [2.] along with Step [1.] is vital to instil a righteous and solid foundation of morality and mannerism in young children.
This is time to remove the discrimination barrier. The barrier says:
a. If a man stares a woman when she is well dressed up, she may scold him; but when a woman stares another woman (dressed up or not), she should allow her and smile.
b. When a man's hand (knowingly or accidentally) gets to touch or brush by a woman's waist or shoulder, she may scold and insult him; but, when a woman has her hand put on or by another one's breasts or waist for long, she should not complain or request for maintaining safe distance.
Let's make an all-inclusive society, where a woman's spouse really be the second person - she herself being the first one - to have access to her body and mind.
Simple guideline: "No righteous reason or purpose, no access."
JAI HIND! VANDE MATARAM!
Further Reading
Read these articles in general context and not relate them to specific locations.
1. 70 Girls Allegedly Stripped In School
http://www.ndtv.com/muzaffarnagar-news/warden-strips-girls-in-up-school-to-check-for-menstrual-blood-1675728?pfrom=home-lateststories
2. A lesbian in love with best 'girl' friend
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/relationships/ask-the-expert/I-am-a-lesbian-in-love-with-my-best-girl-friend/articleshow/47782311.cms
3. Woman abducted from railway station, gang raped
http://www.catchnews.com/national-news/up-woman-abducted-from-railway-station-gang-raped-67571.html
25
The Issue
Knowledge Bits and Steps to Reduce the Probability of Body Exposure of Women at Home and Elsewhere
Women have for long been respected in our country. They have even been compared to demigods and deities. But, in modern time, every day we read or hear about molestation, sexual harassment and even rape. Souls of noble people tremble in anguish and sadness. I have been thinking on this problem for a few years. Over the years, I have come across surprising and alarming facts. Two of them are:
a. We teach our girls to be too open in regard with privacy, and
b. men and women are both indulged in crimes of abduction and rape.
The Process of Learning
An idea or practice, if taught during early days of childhood, are instilled better and deeper in the mind of a person. This capacity of learning and teaching can very well be used to teach bad things as well as good things. The reason behind this philosophy is that young children do not question much and imbibe teachings quickly. To teach and learn is one of two parts; the second part being: The ideas and beliefs so implanted in young brains and minds are almost impossible to shatter or replace. So, the whole story is: a. Learning, and b. Retaining. This second part makes the learning even riskier.
Where We Discriminate Girls and Boys
When a boy transitions from childhood to adolescence, he begins to keep his body covered and hidden from all relations including mother, father, brother and sister. But, when a girl undergoes the transition, she is taught to keep her body covered only in front of half the relations and half the people. She is well taught to keep her modesty covered when in front of brother or father, but she is encouraged to be naked in front of mother and sister... and even ladies in neighbourhood. This is where seeds of discrimination are sown. The logical point is: Women have eyes as well as men have, so they too can see very well what comes in front of their eyes. Then, why is girl not taught to shy in front of ladies?
Where the Problem Lies
a. When girl is married to a man, ideal thinking which comes to mind is that: By now she has been hiding her body from eyes and hands of all, but now she has got a partner whom she may trust fully and she may disrobe in front of as they would spend good time together and make love in its pious and righteous form in addition to managing family, home, finances and health together. But the real situation is entirely different. It's not the case that only one new person assumes unobstructed access to her body and trust; rather half his family, half his relatives and even half his neighbourhood assumes open access to her modesty.
b. Even a doctor accesses private parts of a person only when it is needed. Otherwise patients don't wander naked around doctors. Doctors don't even say to a patient, "Why are you shying to change (clothes) in front of me when I have seen your whole body in past?" But most of women say such things to resisting women and assume continued and repeated access to their privacy.
c. Many young girls and women now a days misuse this undue privilege of access to other ladies' privacy in following manners:
(i.) Too open ladies force shy ladies into this dark world of big openness and the latter have to give in, because it is an assumed rule of society.
(ii.) Mischievous ladies make very shameful and wrongful use of this freedom to appease their sexual desires by helping one another. To the other people, they are 'sisters' or 'just friends'.
(iii.) Few customs are also not questioned or abandoned which require a lady to give in and accept sight and touch by another woman on the former's body. When somebody questions moral aspect of such a practice, she/he is told: "A woman only is going to touch her body, what's the problem in that?" The people think: To expose to a woman means not to expose at all.
(iv.) Criminal women exploit this blind faith of unsuspecting women and plot for their abduction and rape. It is also well known how common it is that women victimise and reach girls to brothels.
When a woman has exposed to over 50 women and now she exposes to a man, she says, "Today for the first time I exposed to somebody." Isn't it a false statement? Isn't it a shameful joke?
Food for Thought
You sit back for a minute or two and think yourself: Should a marriage really mean this to a girl? Should all girls be bound to be too open to the ladies in their in-laws and neighbourhood? Cannot she have right to defend her modesty and dignity from these women and girls? An unlimited and countless number of ladies pass by her when a lady is bathing or they keep standing by her when she is changing. They don't step back when they unknowingly enter such a room at such a time; only men are supposed to try to avoid every possible glance at her naked body. Why so? Why dare women in in-laws' family assume that the bride won't be shy of ladies in their family? Why do they assume as open access to see or touch her body as her husband alone should have?
News of rapes by men are so much in number and they are spread so widely. Please tell the last time when you read a news where a woman was sexually harassed or raped by another woman. Such news are not so prevalent because the women with romantic intentions are getting their purposes fulfilled in following ways:
a. When one woman has wrongful intentions and the other one is unaware, the latter's body is viewed or touched under false belief that the latter should not worry for the former is a lady. NO FIGHT OR STRUGGLE NEEDED
b. When both the ladies have mischievous intentions, they both proceed further with mutual consent. NO FIGHT OR STRUGGLE NEEDED
c. When a shy and truly moral girl is victimised, she has to keep quiet because nobody at home is going to support her plea. Men and women say in unison: "Don't be shy of women, it's common to be open among women. Go learn it!"
d. Society boasts of being conservative and having homophobia, but it has left doors wide open to homosexuals to go and play and nobody asks the participants what they were doing behind the doors. If society wants to keep conservative and promote only heterosexuality, avenues for homosexual contacts should be monitored and checked. Else the society should cognise and respect the fact that homosexuality is no fairy dream rather it's for real and make provisions for people to declare their homosexual or bisexual relationships and live happily.
Proposed Solution
1. First Step
Women and girls should start to defend their dignity and tell everybody: "Only my spouse and I have right to see or touch my intimate body parts. Others please excuse us. I'm not married to you, you have no right to come any time and see my body in vulnerable condition or touch my body in any such manner."
2. Second Step
Teach our little girls and boys alike: Now you're entering adolescence. Now you should not wander naked in houses or on roads. Now it's your duty as well as right to keep your modesty covered. Now onwards, only two classes of people may have right to see or touch your private body parts:-
a. you yourself and your spouse(s)
b. doctor
By 'doctor' here is meant any person who offers medical assistance or tries to save life. It includes doctors, nurses, army persons, soldiers, disaster relief front workers, good Samaritans and any other person who in good spirit comes forth to help and save you in regard with your health and life.
3. Third Step
Bring up and educate all the children together. When we seat boys in separate classrooms and schools and girls in other classrooms and schools, they do not get chances to meet together, chat, mingle and respect the fact the person opposite is no object to exploit or no heavenly surprise but in fact we are all same species Homo sapiens, we are all alike. When we let children study and play together, they learn to respect each other as persons, as humans and they abide by true spirit of friendship and do not think of cheating or harassing one another.
Conclusion
We need to educate our people on moral topics and make them aware of relevant issues. It's not about offering a special or more privileged position to ladies or gentlemen, but it's about setting an all-inclusive and harmonious behavioural system up in society. If a boy is taught to save his modesty from all members of family, society and world, then girls also deserve an equivalent treatment and respect regarding dignity. Neighbours or criminals should not be allowed to see girls in compromised situation because the viewers are ladies.
Step [1.] under "Proposed Solution" is applicable for grown-up ladies including those who had been taught discriminatory things in formative years. Step [2.] along with Step [1.] is vital to instil a righteous and solid foundation of morality and mannerism in young children.
This is time to remove the discrimination barrier. The barrier says:
a. If a man stares a woman when she is well dressed up, she may scold him; but when a woman stares another woman (dressed up or not), she should allow her and smile.
b. When a man's hand (knowingly or accidentally) gets to touch or brush by a woman's waist or shoulder, she may scold and insult him; but, when a woman has her hand put on or by another one's breasts or waist for long, she should not complain or request for maintaining safe distance.
Let's make an all-inclusive society, where a woman's spouse really be the second person - she herself being the first one - to have access to her body and mind.
Simple guideline: "No righteous reason or purpose, no access."
JAI HIND! VANDE MATARAM!
Further Reading
Read these articles in general context and not relate them to specific locations.
1. 70 Girls Allegedly Stripped In School
http://www.ndtv.com/muzaffarnagar-news/warden-strips-girls-in-up-school-to-check-for-menstrual-blood-1675728?pfrom=home-lateststories
2. A lesbian in love with best 'girl' friend
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/relationships/ask-the-expert/I-am-a-lesbian-in-love-with-my-best-girl-friend/articleshow/47782311.cms
3. Woman abducted from railway station, gang raped
http://www.catchnews.com/national-news/up-woman-abducted-from-railway-station-gang-raped-67571.html
25
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Petition created on 27 June 2017