No Child Should Have to Break Before Their School Understands Them – Make ‘Unauthorised Absence’ Essential Viewing for All School Staff

Imagine being six years old and finding school so overwhelming, so frightening and so distressing that you physically cannot go.  Imagine being that child’s parent, watching your little one lose their confidence, their happiness and their sense of safety, while desperately trying to get the people who are supposed to help to understand.

This is not hypothetical. This is our reality.

I'm a mother of two neurodivergent children, both of whom have autism and additional diagnoses.
My six-year-old son’s experiences at school have become so overwhelming that he has now been unable to attend for three weeks. His distress has gone far beyond reluctance to go to school. He has expressed feelings as devastating as wanting to die.

No parent should ever have to hear those words from their six-year-old child. No child should ever reach a point where the thought of going to school causes such profound distress.

And yet, for families like mine, this is the reality we are living.

Our children are not choosing to miss out on education. They are struggling to access an environment that is not meeting their needs. There is a world of difference.

When a child cannot attend school because their needs are unmet, it is not enough to record an absence, send a letter home or label it as unauthorised. We need to ask a much more important question:

Why is this child unable to attend, and what needs to change to make school a safe and accessible place for them?

For too long, families of children with Special Educational Needs and Disabilities (SEND) have felt unheard, dismissed and left to fight for even the most basic understanding and support. Parents become advocates, investigators and campaigners, often while trying to hold together a family whose child is struggling more than words can describe.

The heartbreaking truth is that behind every attendance figure is a child. A child with feelings, fears, potential, hopes and a right to an education that meets their needs. These are not simply statistics. They are children whose childhoods are being affected, whose mental health is suffering and whose opportunities are slipping away.

Then I watched Unauthorised Absence.

For the first time, I felt that someone had put into words what so many SEND families experience every single day. It made me feel seen. It made me feel heard. Most importantly, it showed that the struggles our children face are not isolated incidents or individual family failures. They are part of a much wider problem that demands urgent attention.

This film has the power to change perspectives. It challenges assumptions about school absence, highlights the devastating consequences of unmet needs and gives a voice to children and families who too often feel invisible.

That is why I am calling for ‘Unauthorised Absence’ to become essential viewing for every member of school staff across the UK.

Not just teachers. Not just SENDCOs. Every person working within our schools, including headteachers, senior leadership teams, teaching assistants, pastoral teams, attendance officers and administrative staff.

Because a child can be failed by an entire system, not just one individual.

Every member of staff needs to understand that:

• School avoidance and persistent absence can be signs of unmet SEND needs, anxiety, trauma and overwhelming distress.

• A child who cannot attend is not necessarily a child who does not want to learn.

• Behaviour is communication, and what looks like defiance, withdrawal or disengagement may actually be a child communicating that they are struggling.

• Reasonable adjustments, understanding and appropriate support are not special treatment. They are essential to giving children equal access to education.

• Early understanding and intervention can make the difference between a child feeling safe and supported and a child reaching crisis point.

Watching this film will not solve the SEND crisis overnight. But it can be a vital starting point. It can challenge attitudes, open conversations, build empathy and help staff recognise the signs of distress before a child reaches breaking point.

We cannot keep expecting children to adapt to environments that are harming their wellbeing while overlooking the support they need to thrive.

We cannot keep asking parents to fight harder while the system fails to listen.

And we cannot continue to measure educational success by attendance figures alone while ignoring the children behind them.

Our children do not need to be pushed harder. They need to be understood better.

I am asking the Department for Education, school leaders, local authorities and policymakers to take action and make the viewing of Unauthorised Absence a mandatory part of staff training and professional development in schools.

Please sign and share this petition.

Not just for my son. Not just for my family. But for every child who is sitting at home, unable to face another school day; every parent who is fighting to be heard; and every child who deserves an education without having to sacrifice their mental health to access it.

A child’s distress should never have to become a crisis before somebody listens.

Let’s make sure our children are seen, heard and understood.

Because no child should have to break before the adults around them realise they need help.