Waiting for the verdict: tuesday, 31th
All around the world, people remain glued to their screens as the Depp-Heard trial wraps up this week. However, its revelations and societal implications will be long lasting, paving the way for important conversations. Conversations we must have now.
Before anything, it is imperative we get into the harsh reality that plagues us today. The majority of domestic violence victims are women. This comes to no surprise as it’s been common knowledge for a long time now.
Here’s something else for you to chew on: The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV) of America has provided statistics showing that 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have experienced some form of physical violence from a partner. The statistics for women were unsurprising, but the “1 in 4 men” was quite the eye opener. I had no idea it was that prevalent. And of course the stats here are just what’s been confirmed.
One UK Journalist posited that there is an under-reporting of violence by women against men “due to a culture of masculine expectations”.
The taboo. The fear of being misunderstood. The fear of not being believed. The fear of being laughed at. Simply because they are men.
Perhaps this explains the one-sided media coverage regarding the Depp trial. At the very heart of the case lies the tale of male victimhood.
His career took a nosedive, resulting in his removal from both the “Pirates” and “Fantastic Beasts” films. On the other hand, Amber Heard became an ambassador for the ACLU, she became the face of L’Oreal and she started appearing in blockbusters like Aquaman. She became the heroine, the brave champion who survived her ex husband.
Around 2018/early 2019 evidence in the form of audiotapes and images started surfacing that cast Depp in a whole new light entirely.
Not showing Depp the abuser, but Depp the abused.
Those pieces of evidence, amongst others, formed the basis for his case against Heard. He is suing her for defamation, claiming he was the true victim.
Depp’s testimony of dealing with abuse from his mother to dealing with abuse from Heard was nothing short of heartbreaking. We heard shocking testimony of how Depp lost his finger after Heard angrily pitched a vodka bottle at him. We even heard testimony of how he was punched, verbally abused, and even had a cigarette outed on his cheek…by the love of his life.
Even their marriage counsellor testified that Heard would take great pride in striking Depp, to keep him from leaving her. One thing became clear:
We failed Johnny Depp. We cancelled a victim of abuse, while his abuser continued to rise.
The media coverage of this trial has been nothing short of twisted. I have never seen more distorted and one sided coverage of any event in my life, ever.
The immense misrepresentations, cherry picking and other displays of one-sidedness are, in my firm view, tantamount to gaslighting the public, trying hard to paint her as a victim, despite everyone seeing her as otherwise.
Before Heard took the stand, she changed PR firms due to the public overwhelmingly supporting Depp. Soon after, hit pieces from Vogue, Buzzfeed, New York Times, Allure, The Atlantic and The Guardian all suddenly popped up within days of each other.
The outlets glossed over the audiotapes heard in court, deliberately. Instead they tried to claim “self defense” and tried passing this female abuser as an “imperfect victim”.
In one shocking audiotape, Heard admitted to pelting pots and pans at Depp. In another, she giggled and taunted Depp for running away after she got violent. In another, she called Depp a “baby” for running away from fights WHICH SHE ADMITTED to starting. In that same tape she even claimed, "I did not hurt you. I did not punch you. I was hitting you”.
Her words were, “Tell the world, Johnny. Tell them, Johnny Depp. I, Johnny Depp, a man, I’m a victim too of domestic violence, and I, you know, it’s a fair fight. And see how many people believe or side with you.” In response to this recording, Depp on the stand said, "Yes, I am”.
But we, the people listened, and we believe.
For nearly six years, Depp was hung to dry. Newspapers and magazines plastered his image on the front page with the label “Wife Beater” affixed.
Amber Heard fans bullied his family, particularly his daughter on social media due to these very allegations.
Depp’s story of surviving abuse, given his stature, has made male victims feel less alone. They now have a face in Johnny Depp.
Female abusers are not “imperfect victims”.
Evidence has revealed that Heard abused Depp, her former wife and her sister. When will we cease heralding serial abusers masquerading as abuse victims?
This trial mustn’t be seen as the “downfall” for the #METOO. Instead it should now pave the way for the movement to open up to male victims. If our culture is impervious to the idea of male abuse victims, then that culture needs to change.
Regardless of the verdict, I do believe Depp has cleared his name. This is the story of an abuser who taunted their victim to speak their truth to the world and see who would listen. No matter what happens now, Johnny finally shared his story of abuse to the world, and we believed and sided with him.