In the heart of New York City, a symbol of passion and dedication needs to be returned from its current owner, Timothée Chalamet. Pettiness begets pettiness, and dunking on classical artists after portraying a ping-pong player is honestly… egregious. Clearly, the supreme weight of portraying Marty has led to a severe lapse in character from the former “white boy of the month” and TikTok edit inspiration (circa 2020).

The hat deserves to belong to someone who actually respects the art stitched into its name. New York City Ballet represents discipline, history, and generations of artists who spend years perfecting a single turn—not people casually declaring the entire art form dead between press interviews. If ballet is truly “dead,” then clearly this hat is being held hostage by someone who has no use for it. In the spirit of basic decency—and frankly, good taste—please return the hat to the dancers, the fans, and the people who still believe ballet deserves to live