When son came forward to me and told me about the abuse he was enduring I immediately went to the coach, it feel on deaf ears. It also put a target on my son. Maybe hockey wasn’t his game. Try chess. The president of the organization appalled, but not enough to really do anything but be appalled. My son continues to be bullied over and over. Mostly by the same 2 boys, but they were good players, had the right last name. This organization only welcomes you if you have a certain last name or you are going to make the high school team. Otherwise find your way out, you have no value to this organization.
If you dare speak out about the abuse, be prepared for the backlash that comes with it. It started slow. A coaches wife screaming how ungrateful I was. I was a bitch that nobody likes. Very publicly and very embarrassing. A few people messaged me to let me know that they didn’t feel the same way. I was called profanities by the coaches and my sons fate was sealed that day.
With a promise from the board and the president things with change, it would be different. The physical abuse, emotional abuse and bullying that he endured the previous year would not be an issue.
But it was kids were so cruel, the coaches were so cruel. I watched as my happy smiley boy cried almost every game. He was fading away. Teammates hiding his equipment, yelling at him that he was the reason they lost. He was deemed less than worthy, told to stand and not move. But he was getting his “equal’ Ice time. He left broken and in tears he didn’t want to play anymore.
That’s where the story should end but the harassing phone calls were just the start. People felt they had the right to call me and harass me tell me they knew where i lived. But I had no Idea who they were. But my confidential talks were with the board were anything but. The president could call me and tell me on a holiday that my son had issues. Issues your a youth hockey coach and a teacher and that is how you speak about a child.
They would not let him play (or his brothers and sisters) but they sure as heck made sure that he will not be playing anywhere else. So here he sit sad, broken and feeling worthless.
If you want to be a coach you build children up not tear them down. Show your children how to treat people.