BREAKING: Your spouse complains about work. But do they ever mention their “work spouse"? The one who packs their favorite snack. The one who gets the inside jokes. The one who gets promoted while you get ignored. In this department, the real marriage happens on the clock.
THE LUNCH YOU PACKED FOR YOUR SPOUSE GETS THROWN IN THE TRASH
(While They Wait for the Work Spouse’s Homemade Meal in the Break Room)
You woke up early. You sliced the turkey just right. You even tucked in a little note: “Have a great day, honey.”
Your Homemade Lunch? Straight To The Trash. Their Work Spouse’s Cooking? Lunch and a Promotion
That lunch? Straight into the trash can next to the break room microwave. Because your spouse is at the medical center with their work spouse – the one who always seems to be on the same schedule. The one who just got a choice assignment. The one who packed a homemade meal while yours gets ignored.
This isn’t a regular police department. It’s a police department inside a hospital. That means your spouse works shoulder-to-shoulder with all kinds of people – nurses, dispatchers, admin staff, lab techs, social workers, and other employees. And when leadership starts a “close friendship” with any of them, the VA has very clear rules. But at Phoenix VA Police, those rules might as well be written on a napkin.
TEXT MESSAGES AND TEAMS CHATS THAT SHOW HOW MUCH THEY HATE THEIR MARRIAGE
We’ve seen the screenshots. The late-night “still on shift?” messages. The heart emojis on a subordinate’s Teams status. The complaints about you – the spouse at home – followed by a winky face.
“Still on shift?” – The Three Words That Destroy Marriages.
VA policy explicitly discourages dating relationships between leadership officials and subordinates because they create “the potential to raise Equal Employment Opportunity concerns, including sexual harassment and a hostile work environment.” But discouragement only works if leadership actually cares. At Phoenix VA Police, the only thing leadership seems to discourage is leaving a paper trail.
Multiple employees have expressed their dislike for leadership's inappropriate relationships. The response? “Handle it informally.” That’s not a policy. That’s a cover-up.
Simulated Masturbation Incident
For God's sake, the Phoenix VA Healthcare System's (PVAHCS) "Executive Leadership" and Office of Operations, Security, and Preparedness, and Office of Security and Law Enforcement (OS&LE) retained a police leadership official after he pretended "spitting in his hand and masturbating" behind a young female's back!
That one decision shaped the culture more than any policy ever could.
“WORK HUSBANDS” AND “WORK WIVES” WHO GET THE BEST ASSIGNMENTS – AND OVERTIME
Every department has inside jokes. But at Phoenix VA Police, the inside joke is the promotion track – and the overtime gravy train.
Overtime, Schedule Perks, Promotions – The Real Currency of A Work Spouse.
Ask any employee who’s been passed over for a better schedule, extra overtime hours, or a long-overdue promotion. Chances are, the person who got the spot is someone’s “work spouse.” Leadership officials have been seen giving their preferred subordinates first dibs on overtime, the easiest schedules, and the fastest track to promotion – regardless of merit.
The VA’s handbook says that even the appearance of favoritism is prohibited. But when a leadership official’s work spouse is clocking extra pay and prime schedules while everyone else gets scraps, that’s not an appearance. That’s a pattern.
WHEN YOUR SUPERVISOR’S SIDE PIECE GETS PROMOTED FASTER THAN YOU
You prepared for the interview board. You put in the overtime. You’ve never had a single complaint on your record.
You Prepared. They Schmoozed. Guess Who Won
Then the announcement comes:
- The promotion goes to the subordinate who’s been seen having lunch with the hiring leadership official. Twice. This week.
Under VA rules, a leadership official who engages in a romantic relationship with a subordinate must disclose it in writing to their own leadership. That disclosure triggers a required review: reassign one of them, recuse the leadership official from personnel decisions, or take disciplinary action up to and including removal.
So where are those disclosures? We asked around. Radio silence. Either no one is filing them – which is a violation – or leadership is receiving them and doing nothing – which is a bigger violation.
FRATERNIZATION POLICY? WHAT FRATERNIZATION POLICY?
Let’s pull back the curtain.
The VA Wrote The Rules. Phoenix VA Police Wrote The Loopholes.
The VA has a shiny, well-written policy that says: “Supervisors are prohibited from engaging in undisclosed romantic and/or sexual interactions with subordinate employees.” It says violators can be demoted, suspended, or fired. It says leadership must take action within days of a disclosure.
Now look at Phoenix VA Police. How many leadership officials are currently dating or sleeping with someone they outrank? How many of those relationships have been disclosed? We’ll save you the math:
- nearly none.
Either every single leader is a saint (they’re not), or the policy is being ignored by the very people paid to enforce it.
THE SAME PEOPLE “CREEPING” ON THEIR SPOUSES ARE THE ONES PUNISHING WHISTLEBLOWERS
Here’s where it turns from scandal to serious.
Reporting An Affair Gets You Investigated. Having One Gets You Protected
Several employees told us they tried to report these relationships through official channels. They followed the VA’s own procedures. And what happened? They were retaliated against. Reassigned to undesirable shifts. Stripped of collateral duties. Suddenly under investigation for minor infractions that everyone commits.
Meanwhile, the leadership official who was reported? Still in their job. Still supervising the same subordinate. Still going to lunch together.
That’s not a broken system. That’s a system protecting its own.
HOW MANY MARRIAGES HAVE TO GET DESTROYED BEFORE LEADERSHIP CARES?
We’re not the morality police. But when your spouse comes home distant, distracted, and defensive about their phone – and you know they work in a department where “work spouses” are a known joke – you start to wonder.
The VA’s Own Words: Affairs Ruin Morale. So Why The Silence?
The VA’s own documents admit that leadership-subordinate relationships “can affect the confidence of other subordinate employees, which can adversely impact employee job performance and the Department’s mission.” In plain English: affairs ruin morale, destroy trust, and make everyone less effective.
So why does leadership keep looking the other way?
LEADERSHIP TOO BUSY PLAYING HOUSE TO DO THEIR ACTUAL JOB
The VA has the right words. The policies are clear. The deadlines are specific.
The Policies Are Clear. The Closed Office With A Key and Lock Are Not
But at Phoenix VA Police, those words are just decoration. Because the people who are supposed to enforce the rules are too busy breaking them – and protecting each other when they get caught.
So if you’re a spouse at home, reading this over your morning coffee: pay attention. That late-night “overtime” text? The inside joke your spouse won’t explain? The promotion that came out of nowhere?
Ask around. The nurses know. The dispatchers know. The admin staff knows.
And now, so do you.
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Concerned Citizens AZ Investigative Team – Bringing “Public Awareness” to those that didn’t know: we have read VA Notice 24-17 and VA Handbook 5025.
We can no longer report to OIG, OAWP, OSP, or OS&LE. So now we report to the S.P.O.U.S.E. Office – Secret Partners Oversight Unit for Spouse Enlightenment (Because the spouse at home deserves to know who’s really getting the overtime.)
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READER NOTICE
Concerned Citizens Media encourages readers to independently verify the information contained in this publication, including through public records, official sources, or AI-assisted research tools. For additional information or clarification, readers are encouraged to contact appropriate Department of Veterans Affairs officials or their local VA facility directly.
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DISCLAIMER
Any attempt to retaliate against current or former VA employees, officers, contractors, or witnesses for engaging in protected whistleblower or EEO activity related to the matters discussed herein may constitute a violation of federal law, including 5 U.S.C. § 2302(b)(8)–(9), Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, and applicable VA anti‑retaliation policies. Documentation, reporting, or public discussion of substantiated misconduct, harassment, discrimination, or policy violations is protected activity.