I started working in A&E 6months post qualifying (around 4 years ago) and I LOVED it! It was my dream job. That was the case until recently, even throughout the pandemic I tried to remain in high spirits despite the pressures we were under and witnessing things that would bring most people to their knees.
Nothing could have prepared us for the past 2 years we’ve had, but through fighting this virus most of us ran off adrenaline, that adrenaline is running out for most NHS staff, a lot of us are tired, burnt out and a little broken.
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I had to take time off work a few months ago due to severe panic attacks (daily), depersonalization and anxiety I have to say it’s one of the worst places I’ve been mentally. However I wasn’t shocked given the year we’d had.
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Under appreciated, under valued and over worked. There’s only so long you can keep going in a high pressured environment before you break, as my colleague said this is why you only go to war for 8 months at a time.
NHS workers are still facing the stress, pressures and heartbreak everyday with no let up. It’s hard, it’s really hard.
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With recent news around our pay rise being 3% yet tax being put up this actually means were loosing money so we don’t get a pay rise. We don’t come into nursing for the money but some appreciation would be nice and would make nurses feel a little more valuable than they do now.
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So for my own mental health and sanity I’m unfortunately leaving frontline nursing for now, I’m really looking forward to my new job working in public health, it means I can spend time with families and try help to make a difference.
When you witness the barefaced reality of life on a daily basis it has an impact, we’re human not robots.
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There needs to be a change, I don’t know what or how but something needs to change because when I look around at my fellow nurses I see so much sadness in their eyes, we’re struggling. That’s my reason for sharing this, if my story can help others to speak up then maybe a change can happen.
I shared my story on my Instagram page, it’s reached over 7,000 people so far. Hopefully one day things will change
Instagram @tidyvibesx
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/groups/314519933024565/?ref=share