The removal of DarkSydePhil from Twitch.tv

The removal of DarkSydePhil from Twitch.tv

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Brian Ruben started this petition to Brian Ruben

This is a petition to have DarksydePhil (Phillip Burnell), AKA the self-proclaimed "King of Hate" removed permanently from Twitch.tv. Phil has been found guilty of the following;

*Insult everyone unironically and claim it was just a joke. When comedians use humor at the expense of someone, they usually stick to political or celebrity satire, because the persons involved rarely find need to rebut jokes, and even then, any genuine insult is minimal. If they're bold, they may poke fun at people they know in their personal lives, or otherwise simply describe an undesirable type of person ambiguously enough that people that could be associated with the joke would be able to detach enough to be unoffended. Phil instead decides to openly troll entire races, cultures, countries, homosexuals, the opposite sex, and fanbases (including his own). If anyone takes offense to his humor, he actively mocks them for being butthurt. He has no remorse for what he says, no matter how many people it offends and will defend himself to the literal death.

*Obscenity and profanity without tact. Not much to say about this. If Phil can compare anything with the slightest chance of innuendo, he will make jokes about penises, boobs, sex, and the like. The chance of it actually being witty is nonexistent. He also believes if he says "fuck you" to something enough, that makes it funnier.

*Masturbated on a live stream. The ultimate offense, in front of kids, God, and country. He shows no remorse or care that he did it and got caught. Please see additional petition regarding getting Phil placed on the sex offenders list.

*Stupid comparisons. If Phil can find a "joke" in saying something serious looks vaguely like something silly, often to the point of obscenity mentioned above, he will repeat it endlessly when possible.

*Singing like a dumbass. BA-NAH-NAH NYEOW-NYEOW, BA-NAH-NAH NYEOW-NYEOW. NAH-NAH NYAH-NYAH A-NAH-NAH NYAH-HYAH. It gets worse during his Kingdom Hearts playthrough. Brace your childhoods.

*Gratuitous game violence. DSP thinks being an asshole is funny, far past the point where the novelty would have worn off. In open world games like GTA, he takes a sick pleasure in being an absolute prick, no matter what the end result.
Jokes about suicide and rape. There are no words. Except to say that none of them were funny.

*Laughing at his own jokes. Any person who enjoys a decent amount of comedy will tell you that laughing at your own jokes is a terrible habit that will end up ruining the impact of the joke itself. Phil has laughed at every form of his so-called "humor" listed above, including the offensive ones.

*Laughing at things that have no humor value to begin with. It's unclear if these moments are Phil laughing his retard hyena laugh for the events on screen, or if that's the sound of him literally dying inside.

 

Less notable offensives

-Incredibly obnoxious voice.

- Has a very grating and squeaky singing voice that'll make you beg for a chalkboard nail-filer or a noose.

- Constantly burps, snorts & farts while recording gameplay.

- Downright moronic.

- Constantly makes a PFFFFFFFTFTFTTF noise that makes you want to perforate your ear drums.

- Every time a woman shows up, be it a half-naked hooker or a well-dressed female scientist, he will ALWAYS start doing embarrassing sex jokes.

- Filmed both his television and his computer screen for 4 years, because he is the laziest piece of shit known to man. He couldn't figure out how to use FRAPS and a microphone simultaneously. The viewer therefore has to deal with all the annoying room/controller/keyboard noises.

- No editing what so fucking ever.

- Wasting everyone's time and padding out his pre-streams with narcissistic bullshit stories about his boring ass life no one wants to sit through.

- Being a drama queen the size of Mount Rushmore.

- A first glance at his face will give you AIDS.

- Either grinds for pointless achievements, abuses known game bugs to make the game easier for him, or gets stuck at specific parts for hours that even the dumbest casual gamer could solve faster.

- Hates cut-scenes, always talks into or skips them.

- Ignores all hints and obvious signs.

- Doesn't give a shit about the story or world of a game.

- Has never said anything funny or interesting, EVER.

- Nothing is ever his fault.

- Pissing off the entire internet.

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