A new era has arrived in North America.

For generations, Canadians and Americans have lived with perfectly respectable names for the Great Lakes: Superior, Michigan, Huron, Erie and Ontario.

But apparently, we were doing it wrong.

President Donald J. Trump has boldly shown us the way by renaming Lake Ontario  to Lake America. 

And if one Great Lake can be renamed because someone decided it should have a different name, then surely the other Great Lakes deserve the same opportunity.

That brings us to Lake Superior. Why Lake Superior?

Frankly, Superior"has always sounded a little pretentious. Superior to what? Michigan? Huron? Erie? Lake America?

We don't need that kind of elitism dividing the Great Lakes. We need a name that brings North America together, a name that transcends borders. A name that reflects the proud shared culture of the continent. A name that is both bold and completely unnecessary.

Ladies and gentlemen, we give you: LAKE TACO

And no, this isn't a typo.

TACO = Trump Always Chickens Out.

It's catchy. It's memorable. It's internationally recognizable.

Most importantly, it follows the emerging North American tradition of changing geographic names simply because we can.

WHY LAKE TACO?

Consider the advantages. Tacos are popular. Tacos are internationally understood. Tacos bring people together. Nobody has ever started a diplomatic crisis because someone ordered tacos. Unlike Superior, the name Taco doesn't imply that one lake is somehow better than the others.

Lake Taco is inclusive, it's welcoming and it's most definitely ridiculous.  

Most importantly, Lake Taco respects the new rules. If names can be changed by presidential proclamation, then Canadians should be allowed to participate in the fun. After all, this is a shared continent.

You don't get to rename our lake and then expect us to sit quietly pretending we don't have opinions.

Elbows Up, Canada

This petition isn't really about tacos.

Okay..... It's mostly about tacos.

But it's also about recognizing the absurdity of allowing important geographic names to become political footballs. If we're going to play this game, Canadians are ready to play. We propose a name that is memorable, ridiculous, impossible to take seriously, and guaranteed to irritate anyone who takes their own ego too seriously.

If Lake Ontario can become Lake America, then Lake Superior can become Lake Taco.

It's only fair.

And if anyone objects, we have one simple question:

Why are you against tacos?

PS. Please pass the salsa.