FIVE AUTHOR BIOS HAVE BEEN CENSORED BY THE EDITORIAL FASCIST MARK 9 OF THE JOPLIN TOAD.

The institutional privilege of the Joplin Toad's chief editors refusing to share the full, uncensored two-to-three sentence bios must end. When compared to the editorial staff's own bios, the length of the bios of those who actually BUILD the Toad pale in comparison to those who merely manage it and rake in billions of distracting seconds for their quarterly yearnings reports.

Such attention deficit ought to be distributued evenly among the bios of all contributors to The Toad. We, the undersigned, call for an immediate and complete release of all available background contributor information, farcical or true, long-winded or brief, in briefs or bepanted. 

Disclosure: I am Mark's best friend. All the more reason to hold him and his cronies accountable. He refuses to release our real and full bios until we reach 50,000,000 signatures. That seems a bit much, if you ask me, even by outrage-against-corporation standards, but whatever: GET TO WORK PEOPLE AND SHARE THIS THING.