TOO LONG has Dan Ryckert polluted our beloved podcasts and official Giant Bomb videos with references to the filthy, god-awful, shameful, and altogether embarrassing "sport" called wrestling.  If we wanted to listen about this pathetic excuse to watch giant men sweat all over each other, we'd listen to the ONE podcast that is supposed to be dedicated to it... or we'd go to the gym.  

Yeah.  Fuck both those things.

SO, given the obvious struggle to keep Dan in his "corner" and shut him up every time he goes on a tangent, or compares an actual decent game or conversation item to some stupid masked idiot in spandex, I propose the following penalty be enforced by his peers:

Every time Dan Ryckert MENTIONS, REMARKS ABOUT, COMPARES WITH, or OTHERWISE ATTEMPTS TO PROVOKE CONVERSATION ABOUT wrestling, wrestlers, wrestling moves, or any other vernacular upon which he is then "called out" on by those present or those listening or watching, he must then eat one spoonful of mayonnaise.  If a combination of the above should occur, an equatable amount of mayo should be issued for Dan's consumption.

Giant Bomb is a site dedicated to 98% VIDEO GAMES.  Wrestling games - barely existing anymore because people have gotten smarter with their money - are the only exception to this petition.  He may join in on the discussion for a pre-determined LIMITED amount of time.  

Please sign this petition and stop the monster Dan Ryckert before it's too late and Giant Bomb becomes a Giant Wrestling Turd that takes over the entire world like a fuckin' Golgothan, consuming all our favorite conversations with worthless drivel about face-painting buffoonery and spandex-ridden dip shits.