SURPRISE VISIT ..........

This process and healing are slow and hard! Here is what happened! After a couple of reminders, by the social worker, that time would soon be up we readied ourselves as best we could to brace for the impact. Unsuspectedly, after being repeatedly told to say "Bye" to her Family, I see [Redacted] gliding across the floor like M.J.!!!! Traveling as fast as her tiny, two-year-old, toddler feet could carry. RAN!!!! Intentionally selecting a corner. The one behind the door. I could feel the sadness coming from face. I looked over to Mother and before I could say anything, did: " Aawwwe, thought was leaving with US"!!!

The gloom filled the room like a sudden storm cloud. It's as if thought could disappear, become invisible, or camouflage like prey hiding from a predator! The door opens and the driver introduces , while  [Redacted] remains out of sight behind the opened door!!!! It's fully my responsibility to remain calm, set the example, and lead my Children in the way that they should go! BUT, it took every bit of strength in me to hold back the tears and put on a brave face for them. The weight of this burden is brutal!!

We, collectively, comfort out of corner. In the final seconds, we give hugs and kisses. I pull close to whisper in ear just how much we love : "MORE and MORE EVERY DAY"!!!!!! The driver takes her by the hand to lead away, as the worker keeps telling to say "BYE". The look in eyes shattered my heart into millions of pieces. After a few steps down the long hall, I couldn't look away, I see beautiful face looking back. expression changing slightly from disappointment to a look that said "I understand"!!!!

I saw mouth move, but the word was so soft and inaudible! I read lips! JUST DEVASTATING!!!!!!!!! was just following the instructions given like a good little girl, which is. The driver turns around smiling, as if this was supposed to make my Family feel better, confirming what I already knew. The driver, for whatever reason, had to make sure we KNEW  finally repeated what they kept telling to say in a tone so low that ONLY the driver could hear: " said BYE"!!!! The feeling of failure filled me! I was NOT able to keep my promise to that  would be coming home (NOT YET)!!! NOT ONLY THAT, we all knew it was a forced "BYE" because our Family NEVER says BYE!!!!! We ALWAYS say "See you later alligator"! and "After awhile crocodile"!

WE LOVE YOU TY'AVA MORE AND MORE AND MORE EVERYDAY!!!!